“My brother is getting married,” I began, slipping into some gloves so I could take a closer look at the kittens.
“I gathered that.”
“To one of my exes.”
“Oh, shit.”
“But he doesn’t know his fiancé is one of my exes. We don’t really have that kind of relationship where we tell each other things. And I didn’t know his fiancé was my ex until they walked into the diner and he pretended not to know me. So, of course, I did what all normal, well-adjusted adults do. I lied. I said I had a boyfriend and then Nigel was allyou have to bring him to the wedding.”
“I mean… you could tell him that you broke up.”
Blue offered me the kitten and I took him. He was a sweet little tuxedo cat with an eye infection, a terrible case of ear mites, and fleas. He’d need to be cleaned up and treated, but I had a feeling he’d be okay.
The same could not be said for me. “Do you know how pathetic that makes me feel? That my imaginary boyfriend would break up with me before my brother’s wedding?”
“Maybe you break up with him?”
“That’s also depressing.”
“I could be your boyfriend. We could totally break up right after the wedding.”
“Don’t you already have two boyfriends? Are you collecting them like Pokémon now?”
Blue tipped his head back and laughed, then helped me clean up the kitten’s eyes and ears.
“If you were in the market, I could probably find you a date for the wedding.”
“A date that could pretend to be my boyfriend? That’s a tall order.”
“Yeah, but you’re forgetting what I do on the side. My friends are all capable of being whatever you need. Plumbers. Pizza boys. Pool boys. Big, stern step-daddies. In fact, a friend of mine has been through a bit of a rough patch with his situationship ending, and he could use a distraction. I can talk to him if you want?”
God, was I actually considering this? Was I officially desperate enough to let one of my employees set me up with a porn star to pretend to be my boyfriend?
“Unless you have a problem fake dating a porn star. I know it’s not cool with everyone.”
“I honestly don’t care about that.” Blue had been honest with me about his other source of income from the beginning, and it had never mattered to me. I was of the opinion that people caredtoo much about things other people did that had no effect on them and not enough about things they could do to improve the world around them.
“Then why not say yes?”
“It seems like a lot to ask.”
Blue traded one of the kittens we’d treated for a different one. This one was a little black female. She was the smallest of the bunch and the most unwell.
“Honestly, Rex, Perry could use a distraction. It’s a win-win. You literally have nothing to lose.”
“Perry?” I shouldn’t have asked, because Blue’s eyes lit up like the sun.
“I’ve worked with him before, and we’ve been friends for years now. He’s one of the sweetest guys you’ll ever meet. He’s a drummer in a band. They just play for fun. Mostly they do cover songs at bars about once a month. Sometimes more, depending. He has a cat named Gumball.”
Blue had to go and add the bit about the cat. He knew that I was more likely to trust a person if they had a pet.
“Gumball?” I raised an eyebrow but Blue just shot me a look right back.
“You named the office cat Donut.”
“Can I think about it? What if I say yes, but he says no?”
“Oh, he won’t say no. Who can say no to me?”
