“I did, but I didn’t do anything about it, and I’m ashamed to admit it.”
Anger and pain surged inside me so intensely that Dagon reached through the bond to comfort me, telling me he was coming. I urged him to wait. I needed to do this alone.
I understood how the past could influence the present, but acceptance would take time. “I need time. I’m angry, King. It’s all so overwhelming - the truth behind why Dagon stayed away, the demon things, this object,” I pointed at my wrist.
“I understand. Take all the time you need. I’ll be here." He smiled gently.
He waited.
He didn't reach for me. He didn't try to close the distance. He just waited, and I felt the strange pressure of being the one who got to decide whether the hug happened.
Part of me wanted to hold the line. Not yet. Not until we had walked through all of it. Not until he had earned more than he had earned right now.
But the part of me that had called him Dad for eight years was sitting in the same body as the part that had called him King five minutes ago. Both parts were real. The Dad-part missed him.
I leaned in slowly and let him hug me.
It was not a we're okay hug. It was a we have started hug.
He sighed against my hair. "You'll always be my son," he whispered.
I know, I thought back. That part isn't in question. The rest is.
My eyes watered, and I nodded. I would always be his son. Nothing could change that. Dagon, King, and I were all hurting, and we'd need time to heal, mend, and rebuild.
After collecting ourselves, I decided to seek answers.
There were things I had not told him and would not tell him. The OCD wasn't on the table. Not today. Maybe not ever. That belonged to Dagon and Bren and the small circle of people who had earned the inside of my head. King wasn't on that list yet. The fact that he was my father did not buy him admission to it.
The thought passed without guilt. That surprised me.
Some doors get to stay closed, I guess, and that's okay.
“Why didn’t you tell us that Lucifer created the objects?”
“I thought I was protecting you. I realize how stupid that was, considering I brought you into this life.”
“Why did you choose us to bond with these objects? And please, don’t say it was because we're your sons.”
“All this time, the objects were under the protection of another angel. Two years ago, something happened. Their powers destabilized. We tried everything to stabilize them, but as angels, we couldn't bond fully with all the objects.”
King looked distant, but continued, “There are two bond levels with these objects. The first is fragile, easily solidified but just as easily broken. It exists between Heaven and Hell."
"Is that what you did with us?"
"Yes. I hoped it's a temporary solution, that I would solve their instability and break your bonds safely."
"But that didn't happen," I stated.
"No, it didn't. But I won't stop trying. I want to protect the others if possible."
"You haven't failed Dagon and me." I knew what he was thinking.
"I did fail you both."
"King-"
"It's the truth, Di, but I'll do my best not to fail you again," he promised firmly.
