Laughing softly, I replied, "Noted. There's more to explain, but we'll do that in person. We need to talk to everyone without King there. Can you let me know when he's out?"
“Deal. Still home prisoners, so we'll be here. Just let me know when you're coming.”
"We'll be home in a few days. Thanks again."
Before hanging up, I decided to share my OCD diagnosis with Bren.
I expected the silence that came after I said the words. What surprised me was that Bren's wasn't the bad kind – the kind that means the other person is rearranging their understanding of who you are. His was the kind that meant he was thinking carefully about what to say first.
"Okay," he said, "thank you for telling me. I have one question, and then I'll shut up unless you want to talk more. Is that okay?"
"Yeah," I managed.
"Is there something I've done over the years that made it harder for you to deal with? Anything I should stop doing, or anything you'd want me to do differently?"
I didn't expect the question. And I didn't have an answer for it – not one I could give immediately. He had always been my closest brother. He had been sunshine. I couldn't think of a thing he'd done that had ever made it worse.
"You've been Bren," I said, my voice thick. "That was always the right thing to be."
"Okay." I could hear him swallow. "Then I'll keep being Bren. And I'll learn from you whatever you want me to learn. And if you ever spiral and need someone who isn't your boyfriend, you call me. I don't care what time it is."
A single tear spilled down my cheek.
"You're Diablos," he said. "My brother Diablos. Don't be ashamed. Don't hide your struggles from me. Don't let the pain fester in you till you can't breathe anymore. I'm here for you."
Something in his voice made me question whether he too had let pain within to fester and hurt him. But I didn't get the chance to ask. He quickly said he's beeing called by King and we hung up.
It was freeing to share openly and realize nothing changed between us.
When Dagon returned, he found me lost in thought. "Hey there."
Smiling, I opened my arms. "Come here."
He moved lightning-fast, making me jump. “Holy shit! I’ll need time to get used to that.”
“Sorry.”
“No, you’re not.”
“I’m not.” He laughed, wrapping me in his embrace. “How did it go?”
“Bren said he’ll kick our asses if we ever hurt each other.” Dagon shook his head fondly. “He also wants all the details, minus sex things. Apparently, he doesn't need to know how his brothers fuck."
Dagon groaned. “I really didn’t need to know this part of your conversation.”
“I’m just getting you ready.”
“Ready for what?”
I laughed harder. “Bren’s teasing. This is Bren. We will get teased no matter what.” My laughter softened when I saw tenderness in his eyes. “What?”
“You look happier after talking with Bren. I’m glad.”
I rested my head on his shoulder. "I needed that conversation. So much changed recently – us, the demons, me becoming ademon, the powers – it all caught up with me. Talking openly felt good. I don't want to hide anymore."
"You shouldn't. We will support you. I'm proud of you."
"Thank you," I whispered.
