And despite all the scrubbing of the upholstery I did, I can still smell remnants of Shrimp’s wet coat.
I choke on a laugh as thoughts of the big brute soothe the ragged edges of my internal wounds. With him, my mind tracks to Clementine, the woman who never lets me feel unnoticed, even if she’s throwing snarky barbs my way.
As much as I tried to convince myself I hated her, I think I was more resentful that she at least had Carl, a brother who obviously loved her, and as far as I could tell, she was tossing him to the side. But she was just a hurt kid, lashing out. She never actually turned her ire on Carl. Clem always appreciated her family.
Now she’s grown—still a brat, but in the best way—and I want to be her family.
Gods, I want her to stay.
The drive home from my misguided visit isn’t enough to calm the agitation remaining from my realization that the love of my parents is a lost cause. When I park in my driveway and spy a stretch of dark windows, I can’t make myself go inside. If Clem or Carl were here, I’d go in without hesitation. But if I’m going to be alone right now, I can’t stand to be in an empty house.
I need to run.
Out of my truck, I strip my clothes off and toss them in the driver’s seat. If Carl swings by, he’ll know where I went.
Into the woods.
Taking on my wolf form is like stretching a too-tight muscle. Painful for a moment, then sweet relief. I huff and shake my coat, reveling in the flow of wind through my fur. Then I lift my nose to the air and try to cleanse myself with a deep breath of the wild.
Because my sense of smell is so strong in this form, among the damp earth, sharp pine, decaying leaves, and musk of small animals, I also pick out the hint of vanilla and hibiscus that drives me to distraction. Clem has left a trail of herself in my driveway from the brief walk from front door to car.
As much as I want to turn to the road, sprint into town, and hunt her down just so I can bury my face in her neck, I force my paws toward the trees and set off at a lope. Soon though, I’m sprinting, claws digging into dirt and roots as I propel myself deep into the Chattahoochee Forest, toward the mountains.
The run is more cleansing for my soul than any bath. Taking on my wolf form doesn’t fix the darker parts of my life, but it does allow my brain to rest while my instincts grip the wheel and take over steering. The world becomes simpler for a short time.
Eventually, I do return home, take on two legs, and grab my clothes.
The anger and hurt are muted now, and I keep my thoughts on what actually matters.
Convincing the woman I love to stay.
22
CLEMENTINE
A day later,and I’m still reeling over the bathtub experience. Or more so, the words spoken afterward.
“… be my everything.”
That’s a heavy kind of responsibility. I became Carl’s everything without his consent and almost ruined his life.
Would I mess everything up for Griffith if I stayed?
The self-conscious, abandoned-by-her-parents part of me screams,YES! LEAVE NOW!
A wet touch on my hand has me glancing down. Shrimp stays by my side as we wander down Main Street. My pup glances up at me, his tongue lolling out of his mouth, his brown eyes full of devotion.
I’m his everything. At least I can make life work with a dog.
I pat his giant head affectionately and look for a place where we can pause so Shrimp can take a break from the sun. His days are built around power naps.
Folk Haven has gone through changes since I left, and those alterations are most notable on Main Street.
When I lived here, the town seemed to be teetering on the edge of decay. There were a few staple businesses that were holding on, but more storefronts were empty and abandoned than were open for business.
Now though, there’s maybe a handful of buildings out of commission, but for the most part, the town is buzzing with activity.
Through the window of Coffee & Claws, I spy a line at the counter. There’s a dry cleaner that must also act as a custom clothing store because they have a few designs displayed in the window. A restaurant called The Pond has aGrand Openingsign on their door with a date listed for two weeks from now. We pass by a pet groomer, where I hear plenty of barking inside.
