Ronen and Aspen were both shirtless, wearing only sweatpants, and their hair was bed-rumpled like they’d both just woken up.
Aspen scanned me from head to toe, then swept back again as if he thought he’d missed something. His reaction almost mirrored Ronen’s. Except Ronen’s eyes were wild, and shadows coiled chaotically around every inch of his tatted chest—until they shot out. I jerked back as if I could avoid them, but they swarmed me. The instant they brushed inside my nose, his face darkened.
“You’re blocking us,” he accused.
“I’m—”
Then it clicked: their panic, the numbness tingling in my fingers, my exhaustion. I hadn’t just blocked Ronen from feeling my emotions; I’d blocked them both from sensing me entirely, including Aspen’s weighty grief.
But that didn’t stop the guardian bond from stirring inside me. It twisted in my chest, filling me with a raw, unquestionable fear. If Aspen had been hurt…But he wasn’t,I wanted to scream into my own head. He was fine.
Slowly, I released my hold on the Hellfire surrounding my mind. Aspen visibly relaxed, and Ronen’s slow-brewing anger trickled in. The moment my fiery walls were fully down, he erected his own block, ripping me away from his essence and feelings. I bit my lip to hold back a gasp, my heart throbbing as if it cried out to him.
“Never again,” Ronen gritted out. “You are not allowed to block me.”
Aspen scoffed, stealing the sound right from my mouth. But mine would’ve contained a lot more disdain.
He thought he could tell me what to do while he went around blocking and hiding our bond whenever he wanted? I removed his all-access pass for a night. One night. He had kept me away from our bond for two months. And still was! Then, the second he got a taste of what it felt like to be cut off, he ordered me never to do it again?
I stalked up to him, keeping my gaze on his eyes, and smiled—all the light and humor sucked out of it. I pressed my hands against his chest, ignoring his sinful skin, his caressing shadows, and the barely there hum of our bond. Just that simple reminder that he was blocking me further enraged me. I lifted onto my tiptoes and pressed my lips to his ear.
“Fuck you,” I whispered. “Just a reminder for when you feel the need to be a hypocritical asshole.” Hellfire flooded my mind, cutting him off out of spite as I shoved him out of the doorway. He stumbled back, leaving room for me to throw up an ice wall, separating him from me and Aspen.
His stunned expression settled into a cold mask. I might not be able to feel him anymore, but I knew he was angry. I also knew he was inpain. I had seen his wince. It cooled my anger enough to give way to guilt, but not enough to unblock him. If he knew what it felt like to be cut off, then why did he keep doing it to me?
“Leave,” I demanded. “And take Rune.”
He gave us one last long stare, then snapped at Rune, and they walked out.
I closed my eyes and sank to the floor. I couldn’t hold the block for long, not after maintaining it the entire night.
How did Ronen do it? Was he more powerful, or did it have something to do with his ability to tamper with minds?
I heard shifting and opened my eyes to Aspen sitting opposite me. I didn’t know what he was feeling, which the guardian bond didn’t like, but it was satisfied with his proximity.
“Luc—”
“Since when do you wear sweatpants?” I asked, cutting him off. I wasn’t ready to hear what he had to say, and I wasn’t used to him wearing anything but his uniform and cape or a tunic.
He sighed. “Since MJ realized Oliver’s clothes wouldn’t fit me, so she shoved a pile of Alexei’s in his closet.”
It was weird hearing their names come off his tongue. Our two worlds had finally collided. Except I had always thought I’d be a part of his, not the other way around. But the Lucy on Earth would’ve never guessed her handsome, storybook prince was a pawn trying to hand her over to be drained and killed. Or that she was the Princess of Hell.
I dropped my head into my hands, feeling the numbness spreading.
“Sweetheart,” Aspen murmured.
I whipped my head up, ready to yell at him, but something in his sad expression made me pause.
“Release your block on the bonds. If not for his sake or mine, then for your own. Don’t hinder your soul anymore. Be better than him.” He held my gaze. “Be better than both of us.”
His words made my eyes sting. I didn’t know if it was the tender way he said them or the fact that my hold on my Hellfire was slipping, and I could feel his concern and desire to help me.
“You know it doesn’t just block you both from me. It also blocks me from feeling your grief.”
It was always there. That and his self-hatred. The little reprieve I received earlier had relieved some of the weight on my chest.
Aspen paled like he’d forgotten I could feel everything he did. “I’ll work on building a better mental barrier.”
