Holy fuck.
It’s only words. Words I can ignore if I want to.
Just because I read this does not mean that I have to do anything with the information.
Breathing deeply through my nose, I unfold the paper and force my eyes to read each and every single word, and not skip ahead.
Oh god, I think I might throw up.
Emery,
I am so unbelievably sorry. We all are. Well, Xavier is sorry for bare minimally supporting the plan we came up with, but he never, not once, claimed to not want to keep you forever,regardless of the consequences. I think you might be stuck with him for life.
You will never know how much regret I have for those three weeks after our weekend together. Staying away from you was torture, but I thought I was doing the right thing for all of us. I thought I was protecting you. I know now that I messed up by not trusting in you.
Not trusting that you hadn’t lied to us.
Not trusting that you couldn’t support the plan.
Walking away from you behind the cafe will forever be a scar on my soul.
I hope that by the time you are reading this letter, you are ready to forgive me for the hurt that I have caused you, because, baby girl, I am sorry. More sorry than I will ever be able to express in words. If you can find it in you to forgive a man who is used to controlling every aspect of his life, I promise to spend the rest of said life making it up to you.
I think you might possibly be the love of my life. No, I know you are. And I know the others feel the same. I fantasize about buying a big house for all five of us, with an art studio for you and Darcy, an office for me and Hudson, and whatever space Xavier needs.
The five of us figuring out life together.
As much as this letter is physical evidence of my apology to you, the others have read it and have approved the message. We are sorry for everything. For promising you more and then abandoning you. For promising to hear you out and then ignoring you. For promising stability and then ripping it away.
We have no excuses and we own our actions. If we could go back in time, we would. We’d erase everything that came after hearing your name called out in the coffee shop. Well, maybe not everything. We did enjoy all of your bratting.
You waited for us, every Friday night and into the weekend. You turned up for us, you fought for us. So, that is our plan. We are going to wait for you. We are going to turn up, every single day. We will be here. Waiting at the apartment. Waiting to support you. Waiting. Always.
We won’t fail you again, baby.
Forever yours,
Derek.
The seat beside me fills with a body, and I turn to Oakley, tears streaming down my cheeks.
“Okay, I know you said—Ems, what happened? Oh…” Her worried eyes drop to the letter and come back up to mine, teeth biting into her lower lip. “You found it.”
I nod, throat so thick with emotion that I know any noise I try to make will sound like a walrus.
“Are you okay? Should I not have done it? I just didn’t want you to go into your date with Will without all the facts.” Her lower lip trembles a little and her eyes go glassy. “Please don’t be mad.”
I shake my head and throw my arms around her, squashing a bucket of popcorn between us. She wraps her arms around me and hugs me back, making a soothing noise close to my ear.
I pull back and grab her face with both hands, squishing her cheeks together a little. “Thank you.”
My words are watery, but I don’t give a fuck.
Her words are just as watery. “You’re welcome.”
“They really want me, Oakley,” I whisper in shock. “Like, really, really. They waited. For me.”
She nods, grinning. “They are waiting right now too.”
