I turned in the direction of the voice. Ezra was waving at me from down the hall. His expression tightened when he saw who I was talking to.
“Listen—”
“Stay the hell away from me, Jamie,” I hissed before turning on my heel and starting toward Ezra.
“Everything okay?” the drummer asked when I got to him, his gaze jumping from me to down the hall where Jamie must have remained.
“Fine,” I said, keeping my voice level. “It got too stuffy in the suite. I’m going to go chill in the lobby for a bit.”
Ezra frowned. “You sure? Want me to come with you?”
“No, I’m good. I just…need some space.”
“Did Jamie do something?”
“No.” I shook my head. “I’ll be back soon.”
Without waiting for Ezra’s response, I headed to the elevator. When the metal doors shut behind me, I let out a groan of frustration. The problem was that Jamie had done something. He’d watered the seed of doubt that had already been planted inside my mind.
I sat on a bench in the lobby and held my head in my palms. I wanted to forget Jamie’s words, to label them as baseless lies, but what motive did he have to lie to me? We had exchanged no more than a handful of words in the time I’d been here. I had given him no reason to want to hurt me. I knew him and Oliver had issues, but was he so petty and vengeful to try hurt Oliver by lying about him to me?
He’s an addict.
I didn’t know any addicts, but I knew enough from popular culture to understand he may not always act rationally. If he was high or drunk, he might have just been saying things for the sake of stirring shit up. I tried to remember how he’d looked, and if there had been any tells about his mental state, but nothing in particular stood out. He’d seemed better than he’d been in the greenroom, if anything.
Why had Oliver been so evasive about everything but his desire to finally sleep with me? Was I being a naive fool for thinking that the feelings developing between us were real? Standing up, I began to pace around the spacious lobby, trying to calm down and organize my thoughts, but it was fruitless.
The elevator dinged loudly, snapping me out of my thoughts in time to see Oliver step out.
I stopped pacing, and our eyes met. His hair was damp, and his cheeks had a pink flush to them, as if he’d just gotten out of a hot shower. He’d changed out of his show clothes and was now wearing an all-black suit, something I’d never seen on him before. My heart skipped a beat.
“Hey,” he said, his brows pulling together when he saw me. “What are you doing down here?”
He looked untouchable, and the reality of the situation came crashing down on me like a ton of bricks. I couldn’t lose him. I’d never be with anyone like him ever again. Ineededto know this was real as badly as I needed air.
He crossed the distance between us, and I grasped his shoulders. Immediately, his expression flattened, and he glanced around as if he wanted to make sure no one was watching us. “What’s going on?”
“Jamie,” I whispered. “He said something to me.”
Oliver waited for me to continue, his eyes not giving anything away, but I could feel his muscles growing tense beneath my hands.
“He said you enjoy manipulating people.” The words felt like vomit coming out of my mouth.
Oliver’s cheek fluttered. “And you believed him?”
“I don’t know what to believe. You won’t tell me why you’ve stayed away for the past few days, and I don’t know what’s going to happen to us when I leave the day after tomorrow. I’m scared of losing you. I’m scared that…” My voice broke.
“You’re scared that he’s telling the truth? The guy who forced himself on you, who’s been making my life a living hell for years, who’s only sober once in a blue moon— Jesus, Ivy,” Oliver ground out, his eyes burning with ire. “You must really think nothing of me if you’re going to believe someone who probably couldn’t even remember his last name when he spoke to you.”
“He seemed fine,” I said. It was so hard to keep pushing, but I needed to know the truth.
“He can put on a good act if he tries, but he’s never fine. Trust me on that.”
“You’re asking me to trust you an awful lot. And I want to. I want to trust you so badly that it physically hurts. I want this to be real. I want to be with you. But I need to know this is not just some fling for you, and so far, you’ve done nothing to prove that to me.”
There. I’d said what I wanted to say. But the relief at finally getting it all out was short-lived as I watched Oliver’s lips twist into a sneer.
“I’ve done nothing to prove that I’m committed to you? What do you think usually happens on these tours, Ivy? Oh, that’s right. I keep forgetting you don’t know because you’re agoddamn child. I could be sleeping with a new girl every single night, but instead, here I am, ditching my band and sneaking away so that I can make your romantic fantasy come true. I’m doing all this because I care enough about you not to rush you into anything, while you’re spending your time thinking about all the ways I’m still not good enough.”
