June leaned against the wall, just a few inches between us. The air around us felt hot, stifling. She tucked her pink hair behind her ears, several piercings gleaming beneath the hall light.
“June,” I squeezed out. “You told me you didn’t want me. You told me that our kiss meant nothing. You’re the one that said it could never work between us, but you didn’t even give it a chance.”
Her shoulders stiffened. “And none of that’s changed. We both want Madi. She leaves in a few weeks. We can all have kinky and fun sex and it’ll be fine.”
Would it? Was I losing my goddamned mind?
Why couldn’t it work between us? Why couldn’t we give it a shot? Why couldn’t I kiss her until she believed in us enough totry? God, I was not above getting down on my knees and begging for a chance, even if that felt wrong.
But it certainly didn’t feel more wrong than her fighting the pull between us.
“And you’re okay with this,” I said coolly. “Us both having sex with the same person. Having kinky sex together. Doing all of these things together, but still being friends.”
“Yes.” She swallowed hard, but held my gaze. I could see the armor she wore—the metal shield around her heart, bruised but unyielding. “We can do whatever we want, just no kissing.”
Nokissing?
Was she fucking with me?
I closed my eyes for a split second, trying to find the right words. Fuck.This hurt.Ithurtto have her talk to me like this. She had no idea how much I wanted her. How much I wanted to have a future with her.
My eyes opened and I pinned her down with my gaze, “To be clear,” I started. “You’re okay with the following. Me sleeping with her, you sleeping with her, us sleeping together too? As in you and me, June. Us.Butwe don’t kiss. That’s your rule. We can fuck, but we can’t kiss.”
June pressed her lips together, her expression unreadable. “Yes. That’s the rule I’m suggesting, because I think we needsomesort of boundary. We’ve known each other forever, Dallas. I just don’t want to get hurt.”
I raked my fingers through my hair. I wasn’t sure if this was going to work for me. The very idea of being with June and Madi at the same time lit my blood on fire, but not being able to kiss June? It felt wrong.
What I’d said earlier this week came roaring back.
Why won’t you let me love you?
Because there’s nothing to love.
How did I show her just how wrong she was? How did I prove to her that we deserved more of a chance than this?
“No feelings. No relationship,” she reminded me. As if I’d forget. “Just stress relief for all of us.”
“Stress relief.” I crossed my arms and couldn’t help but snort.
This proposal was going to ruin my life.
I shook my head, still at a loss. “This is a bad idea.”
“If you can’t do it, then?—”
“I can.” It would crush me, but I wasn’t walking away. I couldn’t. “I can do it. But I’d like to have an honest fucking conversation about why you want to fuck me but not kiss me.”
Her lips parted, but no words came out. I wasn’t even sure I wanted to hear the truth.
“Do you think so little of me?” I asked. “I don’t understand what I did.”
“Youkissedme.” She said it like an accusation. “And it changed everything.”
My throat ached, my muscles rigid. “I don’t know, June. Let’s remember the night. If I recall correctly, you told me you wished you had someone to kiss you. Thenyou asked meto kiss you.”
“Why didn’t you tell me no?” she whispered, her eyes searching mine. “Why? Why didn’t you just reject me?”
“You know why, June.”
