He was a book nerd. A quiet man.
It was always the quiet ones who made you scream in the bedroom.
The difference between Dallas and Madi was that she was leaving in a few weeks. She’d be in and out of Whynot in a blink. Therefore, she was the perfect person to have a fling with. She’d go on her way, and I’d be left here with the memories of her. And that was enough for me.
Dallas was too close to home. He knew me too well. Even with the distance I’d tried to put between us the last few months, he always saw through me like I was made of glass.
Why won’t you let me love you?
That question made me want to run.
The answer hurt.
His expression hurt too. The pain in his eyes, begging me to tell him something different. Begging me not to push him away again.
But even after years of being in my life, Dallas didn’t know everything about me. He didn’t know just how deep the scars from my mother were.
It was for the best. Easier.
Madi rolled down the windows and the breeze filled the car. I tucked my hair behind my ears, but mine was short enough to not block my vision even as it whipped around.
“How’s the animation going?” I asked loudly. “I don’t know what’s even involved in animation.”
“It’s a lot of sketching, drawing, and then working on frames. But first, I need the concept. And since it’s for a residency here, I want it to be about Whynot. I’ve been taking photos of different places around Main Street and brainstorming, but I’m not quite sure what it’ll be yet.” She let out a long groan. “I’ll get there. Inspiration has been dry, but being here has helped.”
“We should go on a morning hike,” I said. “And watch the sunrise in the park. I’m always an early riser.”
Madi made a face at me. “Knew you had to have a flaw somewhere.”
I grinned. “Oh no. Are you a night owl?”
“I’m more of a night owl than an early riser. Sometimes I go to bed at 3:00 a.m.”
My expression warped with horror. “What?How do you exist like that?”
“Wonderfully, most of the time. It’s so peaceful at night. In LA, the city is still alive though. I lived in a neighborhood where I could still venture out for a late night meal or groceries if I needed it. But most of the time, I end up locked into a project I love and just can’t stop. I’ll stay up until my eyes are bleeding and my brain is goop.”
“Goop,” I snickered, popping my lips on thep.
Madi beamed. “Yep.”
“So did you do freelance work?” I asked. “While in LA?”
She let out a soft groan. “No. I worked for a studio called Dream Ink for a few years, but they fired me last month. The same day Avery called about the residency.”
“Oh god. I’m sorry.”
Madi was quiet for a moment. “Well, I was sorry. I think I am less sorry now. My entire life has been turned upside down, and I’ve had to work through it. But . . . I don’t know. I think I’ll be okay. I’m starting to like myself again.”
My chest twisted. I could relate to that more than she possibly knew. There were times I still wasn’t sure I liked myself, especially the parts of me my family had created. I’d done so much work to heal and pull away from that, but the jagged edges still drew blood from time to time.
“I have a lot of regret,” Madi finally said. “I think that’s the hardest part. Even just a few weeks away from everything, I can see more clearly what I should have done differently.”
“We all have that,” I murmured. I reached forward, turning down the music enough that it didn’t interrupt us talking. “Pink Pony Club” could wait. “I think it’s so easy to focus on what you could have done differently. But the trick is focusing on what you’ll do next. We all change and evolve as we get older, and some of that comes with growing pains. But you get there eventually.”
“Have you?”
No.I kept my eyes on the road, her question roasting me over the open fire of honesty. “I don’t think so. I don’t know. I do everything I can to be perfect and succeed. I run my own business and I make a living doing what I love. I have my own house. I have friends that would take a bullet for me and a community that supports me.”
