“How and why?” Junie asks, sounding borderline offended.
“I’m so glad you’re here to ask how the man I live with is in bed rather than how I am outside of it. Missed you too.” They both shoot me looks. “I’m safe, I’m comfortable, and I will be home soon. That’s all. Thank you.”
“I need to pee,” Keisha announces as she stands from the table.Why are we like this?
She leaves, and Junie homes in on me like a hawk diving toward a fish. “I know you’re keeping a secret from me,” she says. “And I know what it is.”
“I am?”
She scoffs. “Please. It’s obvious you’re going to stay here for longer. I want to make sure you’re staying foryou, not for that man.”
I could have walked right into that. “I am. I love you both, but I don’t want to have to couch surf into my thirties.”
“It’s a number, baby. You won’t be worth less because you turned thirty. Don’t let the patriarchy lie to you.”
“It’s a little more than that.”
“You have plenty of time to get where you want to be. It takes some of us longer than others.”
You say when you’re one step from the top of the ladder.How small I must look from her lofty view.
“And I know Keisha’s pregnant,” she adds.
Fuck. Of course she knows. I don’t like the idea of secrets between the three of us.
“If she’s not going to tell me, I’m not going to tell her I’m up for the promotion at work.”
“What? Since when?”
“Last week. Acoworkersaw an email he wasn’t supposed to, and apparently, they’re meeting about me and one other colleague.” Not sure why she emphasized coworker like that, but the news remains the same.
“I’m so proud of you. Both of you,” I say. I wish I had something good to share with them. I believe I will, and soon.
“What did I miss?” Keisha makes both of us jump.
“We’re discussing Bri’s thirtieth,” Junie covers a bit too smoothly. “We should do it up big for her birthday.”
“We should!”
The two go back and forth, debating the best places in LA, acting as if I’m not here.
They’ve given me a lot to think about. And they’ve given me a lotof reasons to want to stay with Liem.
Thirteen
Liem
Let me be nice and say Bri’s friends have a ton of energy. Loud, bubbly, zero boundaries. It’s . . . wonderful. Bri’s friends have a ton of energy. Loud, bubbly, zero boundaries. It’s . . . great.
I can see now why touch is so casual for Bri. The three have been wrapped around each other all day, talking with the same crass humor as they did the first time I spoke with them. Having them in the apartment is a lot. Hearing them from up the hall is a lot. Having dinner with them probably would have done me in. Bri had me thinking I was an ambivert until this weekend.
I’m glad she has this time with them, though I must admit it’s made me a little jealous. I’ve had her to myself for almost a month, and in what could be our last days together, I get a front-row seat to how happy she would be at home.
Even though Bri gave me a scripted out if I got overwhelmed,I had enoughrealwork to keep me busy through their dinner and during their first round of drinks in the kitchen. Now they’re all in her bed—a pillow fight away from a heterosexual teenage boy’s wet dream. It’s one in the morning, and their giggles still carry up the hall. I cozied up with a book in bed, figuring I’d be up until they tucker out and go to their hotel, but between distractions from up the hall and some anxious thoughts, I keep having to reread the same paragraph over and over.
They stole my evening decompression time with Bri, and honestly, I’m a little resentful. She’s only committed to being here for another week, and they’re taking two of my seven days—more than a quarter of my time. If I get stuck here for another month, no Bri, I’m on a countdown to unblocking Natalie and crawling back to verify she still hates me.
I miss her. Not only the companionship or the comfort of having someone familiar next to me. I also miss the sex. Having the safety to explore a full physical connection with someone I care for, expressing my affection in the most connective way possible.
