Her eyes search mine for a moment. “I didn’t want you to leave either.”
My heart pounds in my chest.It’s now or never. “Do you want me to be completely real with you?”
“Always.”
I swallow down my fear. “I love you so much, Bri. Maybe I’m notin lovewith you yet, but I’m not far away. You make me feel seen and protected. You push me to be the best version of myself—tocarefor myself the way I wish others would. The way you do.”
“Really?” she asks.
“Yeah,” I say, and I mean it. “I talked to May and was open with herabout the animosity I feel toward Dad. She told me she felt the same. Not that she was upset with him for leaving her but for never trying to make up for leaving me too. I confronted him at Thanksgiving. Told him I don’t care to be in his life if he only keeps me there out of obligation.”
“That’s amazing, babe.”
“I wouldn’t have done that if not for you giving me permission to protect my peace. Maybe I’ll never have a lot of friends, but I’m more at ease when I know I can—andwill—choose who gets to be around me.”
Her tears build again. “I’m so proud of you.”
My emotion mimics hers, sympathetic tears burning at my eyes. “The feeling’s mutual.”
Avoiding my gaze as if she is embarrassed to admit it, she asks, “Do you know what gift I really wanted for my birthday?”
“No. What?”
“You.”
I’m not sure I heard her right. “Me?”
She nods. “Keisha asked me what I wanted for my birthday and I said I didn’t know because all I could think of that would make me happy was being in the Brooklyn apartment with you, drinking wine in the little kitchen, sitting on the floor by the coffee table, taking a walk around the neighborhood, and going to another movie in the park,” she says.
My heart pounds so loud, I’m afraid she’ll hear it.
“All I wanted was to slow down and have one day where I felt . . .
okay again. I haven’t truly felt okay since we left.” She’s speaking the words that have been in my head for months.
“I haven’t either.”
“Do you miss it too?”
“All the time.”But I miss you more.
I ache to kiss her, to close my eyes and feel nothing except her, imagine we are wherever we want to be, together. She either reads my mind or reads it on my face, because she pulls me by the back of the neck, crashing her lips against mine.
I see stars. A galaxy of our own creation, my whole existence meant only to share time and space with Bri. Her lips leave mine, but I steal one more. Then another. And another.
“Do you know what else I wanted for my birthday?” she asks against my lips.
I guess the obvious, “Sushi?”
She chuckles and shakes her head, her nose brushing against mine. “No. Birthday sex.”
“Yeah, I’d want that too.” It takes me a moment. “Wait, with me?”
“Yes, goofy.” She laughs then kisses me again.
Hands on my cheeks, she stares into my eyes while she straddles my lap, lowering her hips onto mine. She meansright now.
I take my glasses off and set them on the couch cushion beside me. “No, no,” she says, handing them back to me. “Leave these on.”
