“It’s fine.”
She shoots me a look of annoyance. “If ‘fine’ doesn’t stand forFucking in New Environments, I am not interested in hearing you lie. Whether you want to admit you’re in love with that man or not, you deserve birthday shots and birthdaybackshots.”
“I do.”
“You do . . . realize you love him?”
“No. I do deserve birthday sex.”
“Whatever you—ooh.” She grips her stomach, teeth clenched in pain.
I rush to her side. “Are you okay? What hurts?”
“It’s fine, this has been going on all day. I stopped by the doctor’s office this morning, and they said it’s Braxton Hicks—going through the motions a few weeks ahead of time to prepare for vagina doomsday.”
“Are you sure? That looked painful.”
“Don’t remind me. Everyone says real labor pains are twice as bad. I’m going to need you to make them give me the drugs expeditiously when the time comes.”
“I got you.”
“Thank you. Now tell your niece to stop sitting on my bladder.” She waddles down the hall, grumbling to herself. “Gotta pee for the twentieth time today. This is some bullshit.”
The front door swings open. Junie lets herself in, gift bag in hand, smiling wide when she sees me. “Hi!” she cheers, arms in the air. “This is for you, my birthday baby!”
“You didn’t have to do that. but thank you.”
“Of course. Open it at dinner.”
“Junie!” Keisha returns to the room, her hand still on her stomach, forehead sweat glistening against the edge of her lace.Ain’t no way that is a Toni or a Tamar.
“Are you sure this is a drill?” I ask her again.
“What do you mean drill?” Junie asks.
“She said she’s been having contractions for a while.”
“A while?” She shifts her questions to Keisha. “The fuck is a while?”
“A few hours,” Keisha answers. “They’re not that bad. I’ll be fine once I get to sit down at dinner.”
“How about you sit your ass down right now?” I snip. She shoots me a glare but does what I want, lowering herself to the couch slowly. She exhales through pursed lips the second she’s there.Absolutely the fuck not.
“Get your shit, we’re going to the hospital,” Junie says.
“What?” Keisha sounds panicked. “It’s not time. I’m not due for another two weeks.”
“Then I’m calling your doctor.”
“She’s on vacation.” Challenging Junie as if she doesn’t have plans A through E on deck proves Keisha is not in her right mind. Junie glares at her while lifting her phone to her ear.
She passes along the information she’s gathered, Keisha rebutting half of her claims. Eventually, she puts the phone on speaker so Keisha can answer the questions herself. Step by step, she answers yes to all the nurse’s questions. “You can take me off speakerphone now,” the professional says. A clear sign the news is not in Keisha’s favor.
“Yeah, you need to go to the hospital,” Junie says bluntly. Pretty sure the nurse didn’t want Keisha to hear it like that.
“What?”
“They said Braxton Hicks pains should not come this regularly. If contractions happen every five minutes for over an hour, you need to go.”
