Jackie titters and I harrumph.
“Doesn’t count. And why don’t we stop acting as though I’m a lost cause, shall we?”
“Nobody said that, Nicholas. It’s just been a while.” She coos into the side of Zoey’s head, missing the scowl I direct to her.
“Yeah…because my fiancée died.”
My mother’s face falls, and Jackie drops a pair of metal tongs, the sound reverberating off the stove.
“I’m sorry, Nick. I didn’t—”
I shake my head, lifting my hand. “I know. It wasn’t fair of me to say that.”
Her chin quivers, and now I feel like a complete shithead. My mom has been the most supportive person through everything, and she didn’t deserve the way I just snapped at her. Albeit innocently. I wasn’t even truly mad. My tone said otherwise.
Grumpy might be accurate.
I guess I’m just feeling a lot of pressure, and there’s no one to blame but myself.
Things with Alyssa happened so quickly, but we haven’t even had the time to really move forward. This case is bleeding me dry. Richard Dunbar is a fucking snake, and for the first time in mycareer, I’m nervous that the criminal will weasel his way out of the charges he deserves.
All because of money.
Then there’s Chelsea’s case and the body we’ve yet to find.
But none of that compares to the knowledge that Isla is nearby. Stuck at Alyssa’s, not in paradise with her brother like she should be. That fact haunts me more than anything.
“I understand why you haven’t dated. I’m just worried about you. I want to see you happy again,” Mom says, pulling me out of my dark thoughts. “We miss her too, ya know.”
I swallow down a lump, needing to change the subject. “I know, Ma. I know.”
My mother loved Isla. She was a daughter to her and a sister to Jackie. She fit into this family perfectly, and I know the day I lost her, they all did too.
I want to give my mom a hug. To promise her a wedding and babies and all the things she always dreamed of for me. But that’s not in the cards.
Not because I can’t see things progressing with Alyssa, but because I’m forty-five years old, and those days have long passed me by. Maybe I could be convinced to have a civil ceremony one day, but outside of walking down the aisle and closing the deal, I’ve been there done that with all the planning and festivities leading up to the big day.
“What all did you make?” I say, trying to lighten the conversation.
“Stop deflecting, Nick,” Jackie fusses. “Tell Mom about Alyssa.”
Mom nods like a bobblehead, and I sigh, knowing they won’t stop until I give them something.
“It’s very new,” I start, and Jackie’s hand rolls in the air for me to get to the good part. I scrunch my nose and bare my teeth at her.
“We haven’t even been on a date.”
“But she did go to his house to take care of him when he was sick,” Jackie says, practically giggling.
“She did? That sounds…serious.”
I don’t even bother reminding her for the umpteenth time that this is new.
“Alyssa is the widow next door,” Jackie explains to Mom, whose mouth forms an O, and her eyes widen.
“The pretty one. With the blondish strawberry hair?”
I pull a face at my mother. “How do you even know anything about my neighbors?”
