SATOSHI
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…
…
FIONA
I assume what you’re trying to ask is, ‘Why don’t you just tell Jonah, there’s an obvious solution right in front of your face?’
SATOSHI
That is not the phrasing I was planning to use
FIONA
I know x
The answer is: childhood trauma
Well, early twenties trauma, which is basically childhood
SATOSHI
Do you want me to call you? Talk this through on the phone?
I’m working, but I could get Charlotte to watch things for a few minutes
FIONA
Text might be better, tbh
It’s easier for me sometimes to write things down – you know how my mouth can get ahead of my brain x
Basically: when I announced I was getting married, my family all told me I was making a massive mistake
My mum called me stupid and short-sighted
My dad said me marrying Matt would make me worse than a failure
Elias told me not to be an idiot
And Jonah looked me in the eye and said, ‘Can you explain why this ISN’T the worst choice anyone has ever made in the history of the world?’
Which really stung, because we were close back then and I’d been counting on him supporting me. Not very fair of me to put that on an 18yo, but still…
Anyway: I’m not comparing you + me to Matt + me. Two totally different situations, two totally different people x
And you are the single loveliest person in the world – this is, I promise, really not about you at all xx
But on paper… just like ‘naïve 22yo drops out of uni and marries rich older dickhead who immediately knocks her up and moves her to an island’, ‘middle-aged single mother starts dating hot younger man fifteen minutes after getting divorced’ isn’t a story people expect to end well
So even though Jonah *knows* you, and he’s an adult now, and he’d probably just be like, ‘Good for you, Fi’ and mayyyybe – at most – raise an eyebrow at how quickly I’ve jumped into another relationship, I’ve still got the memory of that night in my bones
And he and I have only really just come back from that. The thought of hearing something like that from him again…
SATOSHI
