Jump.
‘Jonah,’ I said, ‘will you please kiss me?’
His breath caught in his throat. His hand tightened reflexively in my hair. He leant his forehead against mine and the world narrowed to a single point.
‘You’ve been crying, darling,’ he said desperately, running his thumb along my cheekbone. ‘You… I don’t want to take advantage.’
I curled my fingers into his lapels, the way I had on our wedding day. My knuckles rested against his chest, and I couldn’t tell if it was his heart or my heart that was racing.
‘You can’t just tell me you love me,’ I whispered. ‘You need to show me. If you mean it, you need… I need you to prove it.’
His breath was as ragged as mine. It – he – was the only warm thing in the cold of the night, and his eyes were wild as he tried to find the hole in my argument.
‘Oh fuck,’ he whispered, as he realised he’d lost this time. ‘Oh God, Sadie.’
And then his lips were hot and hungry against mine and his fingers were twined painfully tight in my hair and Jonah Fisher was kissing me like he would never, ever let me go.
I wound my arms around his neck, desperate to feel every line of him pressed against me, real and solid and here, here, here with me. ‘I love you,’ he gasped into my mouth. ‘I love you so fucking much.’
We stumbled towards our apartment, stopping halfway up the stairs so he could press me back against the railing. ‘Hold these,’ he said, taking his glasses off and pushing them into my hand,‘they’re in the way,’ and buried his face in the curve of my neck, kissing his way up my throat, one thigh between mine.
His hands were at my waist, pulling me into him. My free hand snaked under his blazer, and when I dug my fingernails into his shoulder blade and he groaned into the place where my jaw met my hairline, I felt the vibrations of it in every cell of my body, goose-bumps rippling up and down my arms.
‘Inside,’ I breathed. ‘Please.’
I gave him his glasses back so I could find the keys, fingers scrabbling in my handbag as his arm banded around my waist, my back against his chest, my earlobe caught between his teeth. His erection was pressed hard against the small of my back, and his heartbeat thrummed through my body, fast but even, a rhythm that was also a promise. I nearly dropped the keys three times before I managed to unlock the door.
He was already kissing me again as it slammed closed behind us, one hand snicking the lock shut before it was back on me, palm against the nape of my neck. I dropped my handbag on the floor and shoved the blazer off his shoulders. He put his glasses back on so he could help me with the buttons of his shirt, but his fingers were shaking even worse than mine, so, ‘Here,’ he said, ‘let’s try this,’ and took his glasses back off again, putting them on my head and using them to push my hair out of my face like a headband, kissing me once tenderly before pulling his half-unbuttoned shirt off over his head.
I twisted my fingers into the hair that dusted his chest, letting my forehead fall to his shoulder. I traced the darker line of it that cut down the centre of his body, fading away almost completely as it passed his navel and then thickening again as it disappeared under his waistband.
‘Sadie,’ Jonah said, as I unbuckled his belt. ‘Oh God, Sadie.’
I licked along the line of his clavicle.
His hands tightened on my hips, then slid down to my thighs. ‘Sadie,’ he gasped, and hoisted me up against him, lifting me off the ground and pushing me back against the wall.
It was an inherently sexy position and I wrapped my arms and my legs around him instinctively, but the fear that suddenly pulsated through me was just as instinctive. ‘Please don’t drop me.’
He pressed gentle, featherlight kisses up my throat until he got to my lips. ‘Shaw,’ he said into my mouth, ‘I’ve got you.’
He kissed the tip of my nose. ‘Do you trust me?’
I let out a long, slow breath.
I love you, Sadie. There is nothing you can say or do that will ever make me want to leave you.
‘Yes.’
I kissed him, long and slow and deep, tongue licking against his, the tongue with which he’d made that promise to me. He made a sound, deep in his throat, and I fisted my hands in his hair harder, pulling him closer, grinding myself against him.
‘Oh, shit, I actually might drop you if you keep doing that,’ he choked out, followed by another wordless moan as I did it again. ‘Your room or mine?’
‘Mine’s closer.’
The difference was all of five steps, but Jonah didn’t argue or hesitate. He paused only to hit the switch on my fairy lights as he carried me into my bedroom, kicking the door shut behind him and setting me down. ‘Take your clothes off,’ he breathed into my ear. ‘Please.’
He toed his shoes off as I managed to undo the side zipper of my dress, nearly dislodging his glasses from the top of my head as I pulled it off. He hooked the fingers of his right hand under one of my bra straps and pulled it gently off my shoulder, kissing his wayalong my collarbone as he sketched a line up my spine with his left hand, fumbling for the clasp.
