I undid it for him after a few failed attempts. He smiled at me sheepishly, that Cardigan Jonah smile that made everything feel warm and golden. ‘Sorry. I can’t really see.’
I traced my fingertips along the little indentations his glasses had left on his cheeks, drawing his face down to mine so I could kiss them too, one after the other. Beneath my lips, his beard was soft, just as it had been that night when he’d told his dad I was one of the most brilliant early-career researchers in the country.
‘You can touch, though,’ I said, guiding his left hand to my breast.
He needed no further encouragement.
We fell back onto my bed, his weight almost knocking the wind out of me as we landed, his mouth ravenous against mine but his fingers careful, caring, caressing on my skin. He kissed his way down the column of my neck, and when his lips fastened on one of my nipples I almost shrieked, heels pressing into his exceptional arse as my legs tightened around him.
He grinned up at me, a brilliant flash, then did the same thing to my other nipple. The sound it tore out of me was even louder and more high-pitched, and his second grin was even wider. ‘Filing that data point away,’ he said, ‘for significant further exploration.’
Then he blinked, one hand curling around behind him to settle on my ankle. ‘How are you still wearing shoes?’
‘I don’t – ah! – fucking know, Jonah.’ I almost sobbed as he bit down lightly on the side of my breast, nuzzling his beard against it. ‘I… just… oh God.’
He pressed a kiss between my breasts, right over my pounding heart. ‘Let me help you with that.’
He drew back, unzipping one of my ankle boots and then the other, pulling them gently off my feet, peeling the socks I was wearingunder them off too and dropping them to the floor. He feathered his thumb over the tattoo on my left foot, once, twice, three times, before he looked me in the eye, gaze not leaving mine as he kissed it.
I knew he couldn’t see it in the dim lighting, but he knew what it said. He’d seen it many times, as I sat barefoot next to him on the couch.Joy beyond the walls of the world, poignant as grief.
I nearly burst into tears again.
His hands smoothed up the sides of my legs. ‘Can I?’ he asked, fingertips resting on the waistband of my underwear.
‘Yes. Please, yes.’
I lifted my hips up to help him. He slid them down slowly, fabric gliding agonisingly over my sensitive skin, before he cast them aside.
I was desperate for him to touch me. But Jonah just stood there, looking at me, for a long time.
‘What’s wrong?’
‘Nothing. I just can’t… Can you give me my glasses, please?’
I’d forgotten they were still on the top of my head. I handed them to him, disentangling them from loose strands of my hair.
He put them back on, and he looked at me again, and the strangest sound came out of him – like someone being strangled halfway through the most contented, satisfied sigh of their life.
‘Oh fuck, Sadie,’ he breathed.
He wrapped his fingers around my ankles, bending to kiss my tattoo again before he pulled my legs gently apart. ‘Oh fuck, Sadie,’ he choked again. ‘You’re so beautiful.’
I didn’t know how to process the way he was looking at me. He seemed stunned, awestruck, spellbound, like some sacred treasure was spread out on the bed before him.
Tears welled in my eyes. ‘Jonah…’
His hands tightened on my ankles. He yanked me suddenly towards him, falling to his knees at the edge of the bed. ‘Hold these,’he said, pressing his glasses roughly into my hands again, and then he buried his face between my legs.
My head snapped back and my back arched, but his hands were firm on my thighs, holding me open, holding me down, holding me close. ‘Jonah!’
He smiled against me, his laugh a gentle hum as I only just managed to put his glasses on my bedside table without dropping them.
Then he got to work.
It takes a lot of time and a lot of effort to become an expert at something. No one knew that better than an academic. I had let so many things fall by the wayside in my pursuit of scholarly mastery.
But Jonah was clearly better at time management than me, because on top of becoming an expert in his own field, he’d clearly found time to do a second PhD in eating pussy.
