Chapter Nine
During the next fewweeks, Daisy forced herself to stay away from the cottage, trying to go about her daily activities as normal. Unfortunately, without the prospect of another letter from Flynn, her life seemed very empty. She worked in the garden, read, spent time with her parents, and acted as though everything was all right. However, inside, she was completely falling apart.
She’d truly thought that once Flynn had a chance to cool off, once he’d really thought things through, he’d realize that despite her initial dishonesty, their relationship had not been a lie.
Was he truly so unattracted to her that he’d let what they’d had go without even trying to fight for it? Was Violet really that much prettier? She’d wanted to believe that her heart and soul, which she’d bared to him completely, were worth more than the one kiss he’d shared with Violet, but perhaps she really didn’t know anything of men and their ways.
All the insecurities she’d ever had from being unfavorably compared with her sister reared their ugly heads, tormenting her and refusing to give her any rest. Never had she felt so unworthy of love and affection. She feared she’d end up an old maid, taking care of her parents forever, never having a family of her own.
April was already coming to a close when her mother came into the drawing room with a wide smile. “It’s almost May Day, darling. I’ve arranged for a seamstress to come today and make your dress.”
Daisy groaned. “Mother, I don’t really want to go this year.”
Her mother looked as though she might have apoplexy. “What do you mean, you don’t want to go? Of course, you’ll go to the May Day celebration. I have just had word from the committee, Daisy. You’ll be the Queen of May Day like your sister.”
“I have no wish for that silly title, Mother.” All she could think about was the day that she’d found Flynn and Violet kissing in the woods. That had been such a terrible day.
“It is not silly,” her mother cried. “How could you say such a thing, Daisy? It is a time-honored tradition.”
Tradition or not, she didn’t want to be the Queen of May Day. Unfortunately, she already knew her mother wasn’t going to be dissuaded. So many women of their family had been honored in this way, and her mother couldn’t imagine that her youngest daughter wouldn’t want to be paraded through town in the same way.
With a sigh, Daisy put down her book, realizing this was an argument she could not win. “I’m not pretty enough, Mama. Not like you and Violet.”
“Nonsense,” her mother declared. “You’re every bit as pretty as Violet. Besides, it doesn’t matter. Our family has great standing in the village, and frankly, I was furious when the honor wasn’t given to you last year. I raised quite a fuss about it, if you must know.”
And that was really what this was all about. She would be crowned because her family was wealthy and because it was expected. Her mother had probably browbeaten the committee until they’d given in. It had nothing to do with Daisy’s beauty or lack of it. Her mother put great store in such things, and Daisy didn’t have the heart to refuse her.
“All right,” she said in resignation. “I’ll meet with the seamstress.” At least it would be something to get her mind off of Flynn.
* * *
THREE WEEKS PASSEDbefore the doctor finally declared Flynn well enough to leave his sickbed. During that interminable time, he’d read and reread Daisy’s letters, still amazed that he’d ever thought that it had been Violet who had written them.
Her warmth, intelligence, and kindness shone through, and he wanted nothing more than to get to know the woman his little Daisy had become.
Somehow, he had to figure out how to make amends for all the hurtful things he’d said. Why had he refused to listen to her when she’d tried to explain? She’d tried to apologize, and he should have given her the opportunity to do so.
He was so lost in self-recrimination that he kept putting it off, until one day he realized he’d left it too long. He should have gone to her immediately. With each passing day, the gulf between them widened, and now he had no idea how to cross it. What if she decided that she no longer wished to have him in her life?
Once he was on the mend, Flynn had gone up to the manor several times for dinner. Each time, Violet’s vapid silliness grated on his nerves. He pitied his brother for having landed the wrong sister. While Violet’s beauty was undeniable, she was not half the woman Daisy was.
The day after the doctor had finally pronounced him healthy enough to resume his normal activities, he and Heath retired to the smoking room after dinner with a bottle of port and some fine cigars, and Heath asked the question that had been haunting Flynn ever since he returned.
“What do you plan to do with yourself, now that you’re feeling better?”
