Like she hadn’t thought about that.With their dad thinkingof going to part time, Josh wanted to start taking over some of the duties ofrunning the cooperative.They talked about the fact that it would mean Oliviacould take her foot off the gas and have a little more of a life.But theproblem was the foreman job.While her papa was the foreman on record, Josh didmost of the work, and her fathers needed someone they could trust.
Keane was perfect.He’d already passed all the vetting.Thehands seemed to love him, and he had innovative ideas that worked.
Garrett could do his job anywhere.Most of the time whenthey had important legal meetings they went into Dallas.He could be homebefore they went to bed.Together.
But she had tried this before.“I thought Scott wasperfect.”
Miranda chuckled.“No, you didn’t.You have forgotten.Youquestioned him all the time.You used to sit around making pros and conscharts.”
She winced.She had done that.Pro – he knew the businessand seemed to get along with her family.Con – not a Dom and wouldn’t even try.Pro – they could talk business for hours.Con – all they could really talkabout was business.
“Why did I stay so long?”It was the real question sheneeded to ask.The truth of the matter was she’d known she didn’t love Scott.She knew it would be a mistake to marry a man she didn’t love, but she stayed.
Miranda put a hand over hers.“Sweetie, you stayed becauseyou thought you would only love one man your entire life, and he couldn’t loveyou the way you needed.You decided in the back of your mind if you couldn’thave Bobby, it didn’t matter who you were with.In fact, it was better you werewith someone who was useful to you and your family.Someone you mostly liked.Someone you couldn’t truly love because deep down you thought you would dieloving Bobby, but that’s not true.”
The words hit Olivia like a slap across the face.Not thatMiranda meant it that way, but when truth came around after so long it feltalmost violent.
She sat there for a moment.How had she not seen it?Mirandawas right.She had avoided anyone she might be able to love because it kind offelt like cheating when she was younger, and somehow it went deep.Somehow thatbelief—that she had met the one and the universe played a trick on her—hadsettled into her soul, and she didn’t even think about it now.
It was why when she’d wanted to go wild, she’d looked atthose two men and told them she wanted their bodies and their dominance andnothing of their deeper selves.
“Olivia, I know we like to read books about finding that oneperson in the whole world who can complete us.It feels romantic, but the truthof the matter is we’re complete as we are.We don’t need some other half.Lovedoesn’t have to come like a flash fire when we’re eight.”
Put like that it sounded ridiculous, but it was what hadhappened.What she believed for so long.
“You need to figure out what you want, Livie,” Miranda said,leaning in so she didn’t have to talk louder.“I think if you really look atit, those men check off a lot of what you need.If you’ll let them in.”
“I already have,” she replied.“I’m falling for them.I’mfighting it.Not the sexy part.I’m obviously all in on that, but emotionallyI’m still putting up walls.”
“And they’re being patient.”She squeezed Olivia’s hand.“You don’t have to decide today.Or tomorrow.You can try with them for thenext month, but it won’t be real until you tell your parents.”
A knot of dread sat in her gut.Yep.That was something elseshe had to deal with.“I don’t want them to watch me fail again.”
Miranda groaned.“Shame leads us to make poor choices.Olivia, there is nothing to be ashamed of.”
“My parents have a perfect marriage,” Olivia argued.
“They do not,” Miranda shot back with a smile.“No one has aperfect marriage.No one.My mom and dads seem perfect, and they get along, butI assure you they’ve fought over the years.It’s not about never havingconfrontation.It’s about how you handle it.Your parents handle it well, but Iremember your momma being mad as hell at your dad over how he handled Nicole.”
Oh, who could forget that?Not that she’d been there, butshe’d gotten all the tea.Her father thought Nicole had been hiding her pastwhen she’d actually been on the run from a stalker.But all her father had seenwas a woman using his sons, and he’d been ruthless.
Her momma had not approved.
It was perfect, but still.“It’s hard to have grown uparound all these amazing love stories and to not have one of my own.”
“Yet.It’s not like you’re moving into old age, Livie.”
“They worry about me.They worry I don’t have goodinstincts.It’s why my mom is always trying to set me up.So does my sister.Ithink my fathers would prefer if they bought me a husband.”
“No, they would be happiest if you never needed a man atall, and I swear women of a certain age think they’re all matchmakers.Youshould try to tell Rachel Harper you don’t want to date.”
It was Olivia’s turn to chuckle.She knew the woman whoworked with Miranda’s mom.“I’m sure it’s worse in a small town where you’rebeloved.”
“Not worse.Just different,” Miranda said quietly.“Givethem a chance.I see how they look at you.”
She did, too, but she needed to hear it.“How do they lookat me?”
“Like you are the sun in the sky.Like my dads look at mymom.Like your dads look at your mom.”Her lips curled up.“Of course, I thinkthey’re more like your parents than mine because I also see how they look ateach other.”
