“No,” said Lily, lowering her lashes. “She had to—I was born six months after they got married.”
It took too long for me to understand what that meant. Then my hand flew to my mouth. “Oh.”
“She still complains about how Gu Ma made her quit performing after she married into the family.” Lily mimicked our aunt: “‘You’re a mother now, you can’t be going onstage and singing in nightclubs.’”
I knew this was the worst possible thing anyone could say to her. “No wonder she hates Gu Ma.”
“She hates everyone. Which is why I have to get out of here. I’m going to study hard and go to university as far away from Hong Kong as I can. I’ll bring Prince Cannonball, and you too—if you want to come.”
“Of course I do.”
“We’ll go to America,” Lily decided. “The hills are made of gold, and people can say and do whatever they want.”
I closed my eyes, lost in the fantasy of living far from here. “That sounds like a dream.”
“It won’t be a dream forever,” said Lily pointedly, “which is why you’d better work on your English. You haven’t even opened the books I lent you.”
I groaned. “Our Chinese lessons are enough. Gu Ma has me cooking and cleaning all day. By the time I finish, my brain’s too tired to study. Simply opening a book makes my eyes do somersaults!”
With a laugh, Lily curled up at my side. “You come up with excuses for everything, Gah Jeh.” She took off her glasses, wiping the fogged-up lenses with her fingers. “I bet Ma’s asleep,”she said then. “I’ll sneak into her room and get your bracelet back.”
“Then she’d punish you.”
A shrug. “She’d just lock me in the cellar for a few hours.”
“What?”
“That’s where she puts me whenever I don’t wear my gloves or I go out without a hat. She says I’m getting too much sun.” Lily made a face. “It’s not so bad. Last time I smuggled in a flashlight and some books so I wouldn’t rot with boredom.”
I was familiar with the cellar, a dark and cramped space beneath the kitchen mostly used for storing surplus grains. Susu was terrified of the cockroaches and regularly foisted the task of getting the rice to me or Tingting. I couldn’t imagine being locked inside.
“You aren’t to do anything,” I said firmly. “I’ll get the bracelet back myself.”
Lily grimaced, but she didn’t argue. “Did your mother give it to you?” she asked. “You never talk about her.”
“Because I was angry with her,” I admitted. For years I wanted to come see Baba in Hong Kong, but she wouldn’t let me. Now I wish we’d had more time together. I don’t know when I’ll ever see her again.”
“What’s she like?”
I leaned back against the window. Prince Cannonball was splayed across my lap, snoring. “She’s tall, almost as tall as Baba, and she only combs her hair to check for spiders and doesn’t care whether her clothes match—she doesn’t have holes in her ears to wear earrings, and perfume makes her sneeze. She’s strict and rarely gives compliments, but she’d kiss me when she thought I was asleep. She’d tell me stories about leoi san when I was afraid of the thunder.”
My voice had gone hoarse. When was the last time I’d spoken about Mama? I missed her.
Lily scooted closer to me on the bed. “You’re lucky you have a mother who cares about you. Ma doesn’t love anyone except for herself. She doesn’t even love Richard.”
I turned to my sister, parting the curtains of her hair so they didn’t obscure the brightness of her face. “Ilove you, Lily,” I said fiercely. “I’ll take care of you.”
Lily buried her head in my chest, and I held her close. The last time I embraced someone this way was Mama, the night before I left Tunglam.
“Sing to me, Gah Jeh,” Lily whispered. “I can’t sleep when it’s so quiet.”
Thunder rolled, rain spilled down the roofs, and outside beyond the racecourse a hundred cars honked a boisterous symphony. Only Lily would consider this quiet.
“Study hard, Lily mui mui,” I murmured, the lilt in my voice slowly turning into a song.
Quickly grow up, grow up tall and strong,
One day we’ll leave for America,
