“Congratulations,” Alexei said gruffly but not without sincerity.
“Already?” Adrik asked with surprise.
“I didn’t plan on sharing this news. Not now. Not tonight. Not, um, not before Maksim and I could’ve talked first…” I glanced at him, assuming he’d be annoyed that he’d been caught off-guard. He didn’t look like he was surprised. As he lifted my hand to kiss the back of it, he almost seemed smug.
Like he’d guessed this could happen.
Like he’d wanted this to happen.
Like he’d be fine with this news and look forward to all that it could mean.
While congratulations were offered, I sat there and struggled through this dizzying and overwhelming mixture of emotions. Adrik was pleased with the news. The brothers and cousins saw this as a fortune, as well.
Which should have helped.
But it didn’t.
Spiraling between joy and fear, I couldn’t deny the uncertainty of how this could impact the situation with my brother. If he could try to weaponize it. If my identity would be challenged.
I’d been enduring the experience of being caught between two worlds, between two families, but now, with the start of my own family, with this new life growing inside me, I felt like I was torn in two all over again.
If not for the grip of Maksim’s hand on mine, I would’ve succumbed to the pressure of panic.
As if sensing how bewildered I felt, he gently squeezed my hand again, like a reminder that I could cling to him in this storm of unknowns.
29
MAKSIM
Pride and hope filled me with the news that I would be a father.
Throughout dinner, the revelation settled in my mind with a deep sense of righteousness.
I would be a father.
Adrik and I would both be bringing in the next generation for the family. Children were a blessing, and in this time of turmoil and change, anticipating our sons and daughters was a way to see a lasting legacy past our times.
Our father was in a coma, lying in that bed upstairs where he slowly died. It marked a period of loss—of his guidance, his leadership, and his power. Losing him ushered Adrik into the position of Pakhan, but as with any transfer, rumors could run rife that we were weaker and more vulnerable without a current leadership in action.
Which wasn’t true. Not in the least. Adrik had stepped up immediately after Father’s stroke.
In this time of change, though, the discovery of our uncle being alive and forming a network of enemy factions to band together was another direct strike on our peace and prosperity.
Uncle Gregori killed my grandparents and almost killed my father. He had done so for no other reason than to steal the throne. And like I’d wondered when we were ambushed on the road, he could try to rob us of the throneagain.
Children would represent a future to rely on. Our legacy and empire would last beyond all of us, and I was of course thrilled for a chance to meet my first son or daughter.
First, because I knew that I wouldn’t be content with just one.
Not when Carina was so responsive and sensual in bed—which she proved when we got home after dinner to celebrate the news.
Not when the mental image of my wife being pregnant was the ultimate trigger to make me lust for her all over again.
Not when she could soften and lighten up to later admit as we cuddled in bed that she was excited to meet our baby.
Parenthood would be another journey to embark upon together. Sudden, perhaps, almost like our marriage was when it had been thrust upon us. But we would embrace it wholeheartedly.
And worry about it, too.
