The sight of her consternation satisfied a part of me I wasn’t proud of. ‘Why? Did you want to come?’
‘Does this seem like a laughing matter to you?’ Her voice sharpened. ‘What if they attack us here?’
It wasdifficult not to assume that her fear correlated to the massacre in the Ortensian castle. Was she suggesting mother was behind it? We already knew that anyway, but a confession could put my mind at ease.
The more I looked at her, the more I realised that perhaps for the first time in my life she might have been genuinely scared. ‘Unlikely. Jumping isn’t easy. You can only take a couple of people at most. We’re safe here.’
She blinked, momentarily unmoored. ‘Are we talking about acrobatics now?’
‘Shadow jumping. Mother jumped here some time ago to steal something and was overjoyed to find me. She tried to snatch me back, but father wouldn’t allow it.’
‘Mother has shadows?’ Willow’s disbelieving eyes wouldn’t stray from me. ‘Since when?’
This was beginning to sound like a lengthy conversation that I didn’t quite feel ready for. ‘She’s a blood witch. She’s been stealing mine for Gods know how long.’
Silence stretched.
Willow’s expression was void of any emotion. The tension between us felt suffocating until, at last, she sighed and eased up. ‘So you’re really like them? With shadows and all?’
‘Yes and no,’ I admitted, looking away. ‘The shadow part… is a struggle.’
My nemesis swallowed and fidgeted in her spot. Shadows appeared to make her uncomfortable, and nothing ever made me want to control my darkness more.
‘Because of what she did?’ she asked.
I nodded. ‘They don’t seem to want to grow back. I don’t know if it’s even possible after depleting them so thoroughly.’
‘I’m sorry,’ she said, and for a moment, her voice sounded almost… pained.
No. I had to be imagining things. The girl before me would never feel anything apart from contempt toward me.
‘Thanks,’I said quickly, attempting to prolong the faux burst of civility. There were things I needed to know—and she wouldn’t give them freely. ‘Honestly, that woman is a fucking monster.’
My older sister kept watching me. Her gaze wandered more than ever before. What did she see? The hopeless child she bullied or a woman that would no longer allow it?
‘I think she hated you because of how much she wanted you,’ she said, rubbing her arm.
My thoughts scattered. ‘Stop chatting shit, Willow. She never wanted me.’
‘You’d be surprised.’ Doubt shadowed her expression, like she wasn’t sure how to proceed. ‘Lilian’s conception was premeditated to achieve a strong heir; you couldn’t go wrong with Water royals, they’re a great fit for that if nothing else. I am a child of passion, and you were a child of love. Or whatever she perceived as love.’
‘How do you know you’re a child of passion?’
Her face pinched. ‘She blurted it out once when she needed me to seduce an air prince for some twisted agenda.’
My breath stalled. ‘She… pimped you out?’ The words came out quieter than I meant them to.
Leaning on the fridge opposite me, she shrugged as if it meant nothing. ‘It’s not like I minded it that much at the time, especially since she wanted me to whip semi-decent ones around my finger,’ she said flatly but didn’t look at me. ‘Then she started coming up with more men for me to conquer. It was… Anyway, it doesn’t matter. I haven’t done it in a while.’
The admission knocked the breath out of me. ‘I’m sorry, Willow.’
Nothing about her shifted. ‘For what?’
‘For judging.’ Admitting that was easier than owning up to my bigger sins. ‘And not believing you when you said mother antagonised you too.’
The stoic expression of hers didn’t reveal any emotion. ‘I… It’s fine, I don’t care.’
‘You’re allowed to have feelings, Willow.’
