But, no, he’s really here.
I nuzzle closer.
“Are you still awake, little rabbit?” Lex purrs, and I nod. “Feeling better?”
I nod again and sit up so I can see him.
He looks adorably rumpled, not all put together. Don’t get me wrong, I love the suits, but this is a side of him I doubt many people will ever see. A grin curves up the corner of his mouth, and I realize I might have been staring, so I duck my head into his chest. He pulls me closer and chuckles. “You can look at me, but I might ask to return the favor.”
Return the favor?—?
My head shoots up at his words.
He wants to look at skinny, ordinary me?
One of his large hands wraps around my back, and he folds the other arm under his head, making his bicep bulge.
God, do I want this man. I mean, yeah, he’s the sexiest man ever, but he’s also sweet and concerned about my wellbeing. Which is why I want to have this talk before we take the next step. If that’s what he wants.
Please let it still be what he wants.
I swallow hard. My throat is still tight, but I think I’ll be able to get the words out now.
“So—” I clear my throat and try again. “Sometimes, when I get really scared, my voice leaves me.”
“Okay,” he responds and waits.
“It’s like my heart gets caught in my throat and I can’t form the words around it.”
“That sounds tough.” I nod. “Are there things you can do to help?”
“Not really. I just shut down.” I wince at the words. This man is so in control, and I’m an adult who can’t function like one.
“Shut down?”
“It’s like I’m in the middle of the highway, and I can’t get out of the way and everything is so loud and overwhelming. So I have to curl into a ball and wait until the traffic stops.”
“Does that help quiet things?”
“No.” I shake my head. “I just suffer in silence.”
“Are you familiar with the term ‘Little’?”
“Kinda. Like when there’s a Daddy who cares for the Little while he plays with toys.”
“Sometimes they play with toys, but it’s more about letting someone care for you in every way so you can just let go.”
“What you did before was nice. It made me feel safe, and I didn’t have to worry because I knew you would protect me.”
He kisses the top of my head. “I will.”
“But then I heard a loud noise, and I panicked again.”
“I’m sorry about that. I’ll be more careful.”
“No, I shouldn’t be so pathetic.”
“Rory.” His voice is firm. “I will not have you talking bad about yourself. You are not pathetic.”
