“Sofia, I’m dealing with something. I’ll need to call you right back,” Phillipe said, answering my call on the third ring. The next thing I knew, hung up without giving me the opportunity to say shit.
“Fuck,” I muttered, staring at the phone, feeling defeated. Exhaling loudly, I found Vincent’s number. Instead of dialing it, I just stared at his name. Vincent and Phillipe couldn’t be different. Their temperaments, their personalities, everything about them screamed night and day.
If I had to choose between whom to trust with this situation, I’d easily pick Phillipe. Vincent would probably end up getting himself killed if I went to him about this. Then I’d have to live with that guilt for the rest of my life.
“Shit,” I mumbled, switching my phone back to my home screen. I needed to trust the process and wait for my mother and whatever her grand master plan was. However, I was going to give her two weeks tops, and then I would take matters into my own hands. This wasn’t just unfair to me; it was tremendously unfair to Rocki, not to mention unhealthy. Placing my elbows on both knees, I leaned forward as I bent my head and closed my eyes. I remained like that for about a minute or two.
“Mommy,” my head snapped up at the tiny voice and soft, gentle hand that touched the top of my head. I looked into my child's sleepy eyes and smiled lovingly.
“Rocki, my Rocki,” I said, reaching for the toddler and wrapping my loving arms around my child. I rained kisses on those chubby cheeks.
“Did silly mommy wake you by being too loud?” Rocki giggled and nodded.
“Do you want mommy to climb into bed now so you can sleep better?” I asked, playing with the soft curls on Rocki’s head, wishing I could let the strands grow longer.
“Can I have somewata?” Rocki asked.
“Of course you can, my Rocki. Let’s go.” Lifting my darling child in my arms, we headed to the kitchen for a drink of water. This was exactly why I needed my mother to speed up the process of what she planned to do. It was getting harder and harder to give off the appearance that Rocki was a gifted child with autism who could barely speak.
I was tired of living my life as a lie. It was time for the truth to come out.
Chapter Eleven- Buddha
“Are you trying to get us killed before we get to Dior?” Lorenzo asked, grabbing the inside of the roof of my Bugatti. I squeezed the steering wheel, ignoring him. I was so mad that I could practically see everything double. My vision was all the way fucked up as I drove, but I couldn’t stop because my wife needed me.
Hearing Dior cry over the phone like that, shit, I never felt so useless in my life. I swear it pained my chest so much that I thought I was having a heart attack. When I got off the phone with Dior, I called Lorenzo and told him that whatever he was doing, he needed to stop because I was coming to get him.
I let Dior know she needed to get back inside the restaurant and wait for me. She got strict instructions to stay right there until she saw me.
“I’m getting soft,” I mumbled, the realization more to myself than to Lorenzo. I could feel him look at me, and I took a deep breath.
“What do you mean?” He asked.
“I had the opportunity to kill Jeremy, and I left that mothafucka to see another day. I think he had been following me that day at the gas station. I should have dealt with it then, but I didn’t. Ever since Dior came into my life, I’ve been losing my edge. I’m getting too fucking soft; letting my guard down is going to get somebody I love killed,” I explained to Lorenzo.
Things like this I don’t discuss; I don’t ever open up to anyone, but this circumstance that I was faced with. I couldn’t help but pour my heart out to one person I respected just as much as my father.
“Let me tell you something, Buddha. There’s a saying behind every great man is a woman holding him down. Women have a way of changing things. You see the world differently, and you want to do good by them. The way I see it, if you meet a woman and you don’t automatically want to be better, do better for her. Then fuck it, she’s not the one for you.
When you love a woman, there’s nothing you’d want more than to be a better man for her. The way I see it, Buddha, you’re a maninn amorato(in love). Don’t look at it as you’re getting soft. This means you’ve got more to protect, and it’s important to keep your guard up, but never soft…you’re never soft,” Lorenzo said, reaching over; he lightly patted me on my shoulder. I nodded my head, appreciating his words because I sure needed them.
“Sometimes you can be a real insightful mothafucka, you know that,” I said, finding a parking spot right next to Dior’s Porsche.
“You’re like the son I never wanted,you know that?” Lorenzo said, and all we could do was burst out laughing because he’d said this to me in the past before. “Nah, I really want to see you and Dior win. She’s apetardo(firecracker), but she’s just what you need.”
I continued laughing as Lorenzo and I hopped out of my vehicle. We both walked over to Dior’s Porsche and peered inside. I looked in the backseat just to be sure Jeremy didn’t leave anything behind. However, there was nothing amiss.
“Let’s go inside,” I said, pointing at the Chick-fil-A restaurant. Lorenzo and I made our way toward the door of the fast-food restaurant. I reached up and pulled the elastic band holding my hair, letting my curls fall to my shoulders.
I scanned around the room once I walked in, but did not see Dior.
“You see her?” I asked, turning to Lorenzo, who was also looking around. By now, we had begun to get curious stares from people in the restaurant. The women in the restaurant were boldly staring at a half-Italian and a whole-Italian as though we were something to eat.
“Nope,” he replied. Immediately, I became annoyed because I told Dior to sit here and wait for me. I felt a sense of panic fill my chest, wondering if Jeremy somehow came back and snatched her. Taking a deep, calming breath, I reached for the phone in my pocket.
Just as Dior’s phone began to ring, the door to the restroom opened, and she walked out. Holding her phone in her hand, she was about to take my call when she looked up and saw me. I never felt so relieved in my life.
Putting my phone away, I walked briskly over to her. The first thing I did was hold her face on either side so I could look into her eyes. “Are you good? Did he hurt you?”
