Page 37 of Deceived Wrath

For a while, Scout was really understanding about why I couldn't always be with him in LA. But lately, every phone call has turned into a battle, which leaves me feeling like the worst parent in the world.

But that's not his fault. He's only a kid. He doesn't understand what it means to be a Sullivan.

And part of me wishes that he never will.

"I just can't, Scout. You know this."

"But—"

"No buts. It's time for you to go to bed. Otherwise, no pancakes for breakfast. You know the rules."

"I don't like pancakes."

"Oh, yeah? I guess there will just be more for Ray to eat, and you can have oatmeal instead."

"Ew! No! Ihateoatmeal."

"Then you better hope there are enough pancakes for you."

"Fine, I'm going to bed. I love you, Daddy!" Scout practically yells down the phone.

"I love you too, Scout."

The phone goes dead, and I don't know how long I sit there, staring at the smiling photo of my son as I fight the urge to book the next red-eye flight to LAX.

I'm still contemplating it when my phone starts to ring again with another call from Scout, and I roll my eyes.

"Scout, you really have to go to bed?—"

"Cormac, it's me," Ray grunts. "We need to talk."

I straighten in my seat.

"About what? Is it Scout? Is he still refusing to sleep?"

"That's only the tip of the iceberg."

"Fuck. How bad is it?"

"It's bad. He's not coping well with you being gone, and he's becoming difficult for me to manage."

This is what I've been afraid of. I close my eyes.

"You know I will always be here to help in any way I can, but...let's face it. I'm not getting any younger, and I worry about being able to protect your kid should something happen."

"Hassomething happened? Is that where this is coming from?" I demand, flooded by that familiar rush of panic that has me losing the ability to think straight.

"No, no. Nothing like that."

I exhale a breath.

"It's just something I've been thinking about lately. Scout is a great kid, and it feels wrong that you're not here to see that."

"Believe me, I'm not on some sort of luxury vacation over here. I would do anything to be with Scout."

"Then I think it's time you start doing it."

Ray has done everything he can to help me out over the years, and I'll forever be grateful for that. But he's also right. He's not getting any younger.