I stare at my phone for several long minutes, willing it to light up, but it never does.
“That’s fine, Maddie.” I mumble to myself, shoving my phone into my pocket. “You don't want to answer me? Fine, I'll come to you.”
She needs to see this shit whether she wants to talk to me or not. We’ve had enough space.
By the time I pull into campus, my foot is still heavy on the gas from the drive over. I scan every sidewalk from inside my Jeep, finding nothing but jack and shit. I kill the engine and climb out, making my way toward one of the benches in the middle of the courtyard. If she’s around, she’ll have to walk past me.
Twenty minutes crawl by, students bustling around me, but I barely register any of it. All I’m focused on is a flash of auburn hair, but I find nothing. I start to bounce my knee against the bench, a familiar restlessness starting to crawl beneath my skin. I realize that I haven’t taken a pill since this morning and my hands are starting to shake. I also haven’t eaten anything today, but all that shit can wait. All I can think of is finding Maddie.
Finally, movement catches my eye.There she is.She’s walking with Kaitlin, holding a small stack of books to her chest as they leave the library. She’s smiling at something Kaitlin says, and I can’t help but to stand there like a fucking creep and just watch her, but I don’t care. I’d watch her forever if she’d let me.
She reaches for her phone, and one of her books slips from the stack, hitting the sidewalk with a dull thud. Without thinking, I take a step towards her, and that’s when I know she senses me. She grabs the book off the floor and looks up at me, our eyes connecting like two strong magnets desperately needing to connect. Those copper eyes lock onto mine, and something in my chest tightens so painfully that it’s hard to breathe.
Kaitlin notices a second later, following Maddie’s gaze until she spots me, the smile disappearing from her face with a fucking quickness.
Great. Wonderful. Super hopeful right now.
I start toward them with a purpose, weaving through the students crowding the courtyard. The second Maddie notices I’m on the move, her smile disappears as she lowers her head and turns away, picking up her pace.
I’m fucking done watching her walk away from me.
Before I can reach her, Kaitlin steps in front of me, throwing her arm across my path like some goddamn security guard. I shove her hand aside and keep going.
“Stop, Miles!” she snaps, planting herself right back in front of me. “She doesn’t want to fucking talk to you, you goddamn freak.”
The words barely register as I watch Maddie pull on Kaitlin’s shoulder, willing her to leave me alone and walk away with her. But she doesn’t budge, just continues pushing at my chest until I stumble backwards.
“I just need to talk to her, Kaitlin. Shit!” I throw my hands up in frustration, trying to keep what little patience I have left from snapping.
She shoves me again and I’m getting fucking pissed, but I won’t hurt her. She’s the only friend Maddie has right now, and Idon’t want to piss her off more than I already have. Or add to the reasons why she hates me.
“I already told you,” Kaitlin says, glaring up at me without an ounce of fear, “she doesn’t want to fucking talk to you, Miles.”
Maddie gives up trying to pull Kaitlin away from me and starts to walk in the opposite direction. Everyone has already stopped to look at the scene we’ve created, but I don’t fucking care. I need to tell her what I saw. Maybe she’ll recognize him from his eyes. Maybe we can figure out who he is together.
“Maddie, wait!” I yell, as Kaitlin tries to block me again. I sidestep her before she can plant herself in front of me once more, closing the distance between Maddie and me in only a few strides.
My fingers wrap gently around her forearm as I turn her toward me.
“Don’t Miles! Don’t you fucking touch me!” she screams, jerking her arm out of my grip.
Her bright copper eyes bore into me, and I can see how pissed she is. The look she’s giving me goes straight to my dick and I mentally will it to calm the fuck down. This isn’t the right time for that now. She begins to walk away from me again, so I yell at her.
“I caught him on camera!” The words explode out of my mouth in a rush. That stops her dead in her tracks, so I continue. “I saw him, Mads. I put cameras up in my apartment and he came back.”
She slowly turns around, the anger drained from her face, replaced with unmistakable fear. She nods her head and walks back towards me. A single tear falls from her eye and I hold my arms open for her to walk into, but she doesn’t. She stops just outside my reach.
“I want you to show me.” Her voice is barely above a whisper, “This doesn’t fix what you’ve done, but I’ll go with you.”
I drop my arms and look down, accepting that she’s giving me something at least, and nod. I’ll take whatever she’s willing to give me.
“Nope, nuh uh. I’m putting my foot down, Maddie. You can’t honestly be willing to go with him after everything he’s done!” Kaitlin says, huffing and puffing like a little demon.
She gives me a disgusted look and I keep my eyes trained on her face and square my shoulders, every muscle in my body begging me to tell her to mind her own damn business. But I bite my tongue, literally crushing it between my teeth until I taste blood. The last thing I need is another argument, not when I finally have Maddie talking to me again.
“I’ll be alright, Kay. Don’t worry about me, okay? I’ll text you.” Maddie looks over at me and nods, walking past me with her books tight to her chest, going straight towards my Jeep.
As I glance back over my shoulder one last time, I catch Kaitlin still standing exactly where we left her.
