Hecate let her own thoughts nearly drive her to madness, pulling one knee up to her chest and holding herself in her own embrace. A touch that was cold, one that she had become used to knowing. She curled up around the pillow and gripped it tight to her chest, letting her mind wander. For a few, brief minutes, it would be okay. It wouldn’t hurt that badly if she let her thoughts go a little further, to imagine what it would be like if she allowed Aeëtes in.
If she let him give her everything that he was offering. She mused on the idea of waking up next to Aeëtes, of seeing his face in the morning sun of his father. What it would be like to fall asleep on his chest, to see his goofy smile every time that she looked up from her table…her table.
The thought of her life in the Underworld came crashing down on her like a burst of cold water. She nearly sat straight up in bed, the crushing reality threatening to drown her and her heart in the sea. Her warring emotions mixed within her, sending her careening down a hill with so much force, she didn’t know if she would ever stop. Hecate ran her hand through her hair, absentmindedly braiding the long, auburn strands again, like she did whenever she was anxious. The front of her chiton was still wet from when she had nearly thrown herself at Aeëtes on deck. What it had felt like to be pressed up against him…
A quiet knock at her door shook her from her spiral. Hecate stood up, smoothing and retying the drape of her garment, squaring her shoulders. It was her greatest witchcraft, how quickly she could repress her emotions, and it wasn’t a skill she was proud of. She opened the door, expecting to find Aeëtes…and there stood Pelias.
“Oh!” Hecate couldn’t keep some of the disappointment off her face, and Pelias only smiled.
“You were expecting someone else?” He had a wry smile, not unkind, but he raised an eyebrow.
“Maybe.” Hecate blushed. For some reason, she felt calmer around Pelias and didn’t rush to hide her emotions or keep her stoicism.
“Do you mind?” Pelias held up a jug of wine, motioning to the inside of her cabin. Hecate nodded and opened the door wider, letting Pelias step inside. He walked towards the barrels in the corner, pouring cups for the both of them. Hecate grabbed one and couldn’t help but study Pelias a little more closely. He had a peculiar way of dressing, with a short chiton and a million things always hanging off him. She counted no less than three seafaring instruments and two other small satchels of what she assumed was wine.
“What can I do for you?” Hecate took a prim sip.
“Why do you think that Aeëtes doesn’t mean what he says?” Pelias’s voice was quiet and unassuming, but he cut straight to the quick. Hecate took another longer sip of wine.
“I don’t know what you mean.”
“I’ve known Aeëtes since we were boys. I’ve never seen him like this. He cares for you, Hecate, deeply.”
“If you’ve never seen him like this, how do you know that this isn’t some fleeting flight of fancy? Some trial of lust?”
Pelias shook his head.
“Nice try. I’ve seen him infatuated. I know what it looks like. This is nothing of the sort. He’s offering you his entire heart on a plate, Hecate. If you don’t like him, then it doesn’t matter. But…I have a feeling that you feel the same. Which is the only reason I’m saying anything.”
Hecate was quiet for a moment. Pelias didn’t push her. He didn’t goad. He simply waited, as if he had all the time in the world. Which was ironic, coming from the one mortal in the conversation. When Hecate finally spoke, her voice was quiet, as if she said her fears too loud, they would come true.
“He would never be happy in the Underworld, Pelias.”
The sailor’s eyes snapped to Hecate, studying her without judgement as he mulled over her words. He waited, his silence encouraging her to continue.
“I could never commit to living in Greece. I don’t even commit to visiting the other gods on Mt. Olympus. I need to be in the Underworld. This trip was supposed to be a short break.”
“You don’t think that Aeëtes could learn to love the Underworld?”
“I’m sure that he would find the positives in it.” Hecate playfully rolled her eyes. “As he always does, but time passes. Eventually, he would begin to resent it. Resent me. He would miss the sea…and his freedom.”
“His freedom,” Pelias repeated the words gently, nodding, one hand stroking his beard. “Would he be trapped?”
“Goodness, no.” Hecate shook her head. “He could travel across realms with my help or another god’s. He might be able to learn to do it himself if we ever discover the extent of his abilities as a demi-god.” She took a sip of her wine while Pelias continued to nod.
“So…he wouldn’t be trapped. That seems pretty free to me.”
“It wouldn’t be enough. It never is.”
“Ah,” Pelias let out a long sigh. “There it is. The resolution of someone who has had their heart broken.” There was a sad smile on his face while Hecate looked stunned.
“Excuse me?”
It was Pelias’s turn to take a long sip of wine.
“Only someone who has had their heart broken would speak in such depressing ultimatums. You may be a goddess, but even the gods grant men their free will. This sounds like a choice that you should give Aeëtes, yet you’ve made it for him.”
“He’s not a man. He’s a demi-god.”
