“Yes.” Nyx blinked as a few tears fell.
Erebus struggled to keep his emotions off his face.When was the last time I even saw her cry?
“It was a sanctuary, and now, the gods have convinced mankind that only the worst souls are sent here. I can’t understand why you want to do anything for those creatures.”
She turned away from him once more, and Erebus felt defeat settle into his bones.
He had come here to try and move past their disagreements, but it was obvious to him now that if the surface world was in turmoil…so would Nyx and Erebus. He saw the appeal of cooperating with the gods and was tempted by the praise they received. He knew now with certainty that Nyx was turned off to the idea. She watched how the other gods had treated her, treated herchildren,and there would be no changing her mind.
Smoke and shadows began to pool around Erebus’s feet again as he began to disappear into the mist, his human form evaporating to his primordial shadows. He looked at her once more before he vanished.
“It doesn’t have to be so black and white, Nyx.”
“Darkness and light always are.”
???
Nyx wandered quietlythrough the Underworld, abandoning her body in exchange for her primordial form. She moved through the fields like a rolling wave of nightfall, bringing with her waves of darkness. It wasn’t the same as when Erebus was beside her. The blackness ran deeper when he was there, and it gave Nyx space to let her mind drift to the night. Now, it felt like she was pulling double duty. They had been able to continue working in tandem, but it was apparent that Erebus was still upset over her refusal to join the cause of the gods.
She wasn’t obtuse. She knew what it was like to be worshipped by man. Before the gods and titans had begun to corrupt and run amok amongst the humans, the world had respected Nyx. They had loved her, worshipped her, even. She was the mother of death and sleep, the consort of darkness, and they had adored her for what she had created. Women prayed to her for safety in the shadow of the night and laid offerings at her temples for divine, feminine blessings. Her power was known for its all-consuming strength.
Then… the gods happened, and mankind was easily polluted. They stopped seeing Nyx as a goddess of creation in her own right and started seeing her as something to fear. It was the gods first. They had ransacked her temples and burned them, tossing her acolytes out into the street. Then the men forgot. Only a generation or two later, the women had forgotten too.
It hurt, yet she was not lost in her ego. Nyx moved on as normal, creating the Underworld and pouring more realms out for the souls that eventually all came through to her. Erebus told her that she needed to delegate. It was something that Nyx couldn’t get comfortable with—all the realms of the Underworld were hers. When night fell, the entire world was her domain, too. Who else would she pass that off to?
Over the past century as the conflict had risen, a few of the less intrusive gods had found their way to her depths. Nyx was fine passing off parts of it to Hades, whom she found onlyslightlyless annoying than his brothers. A few of the other gods that had followed him weren’t terrible, either. Tartarus remained Nyx’s. She wouldn’t give it up to anyone, no matter how awful the humans now described it.
Could they not let me have one thing?Her thoughts turned petty, and she chided herself for it, moving around the Elysium border.First, they came for me. Will there be no safe spaces left? A refuge! It is a refuge and yet, they run from the rest. They hide from it. They tremble in front of Thanatos, even Hypnos.
“Someone is always sleeping, Mother.”Hypnos’s last words rang out in Nyx’s mind as she thought of their last conversation when she asked him to spend more time in the Underworld. Everything on Earth was making her nervous, a feeling that—like loneliness—was new to Nyx until this century.
Thanatos was stoic and calm. He had a presence that sucked up all the oxygen in a room, but instead of feeling oppressive, it felt gentle. It was as if he was removing all the necessary decisions from you and giving you the permission tolet go.While it might be an unwelcome feeling to a young man in the middle of a sunny afternoon, it was an unparalleled comfort to those whose thread had been cut by the Fates.
Nyx’s thoughts were never far from concern about Thanatos. Her son had always taken such pride in aiding the human world, and now she couldn’t bear that the humans greeted him with fear on their faces.
2
Asphodel was noisy. It was a lot noisier than Nyx was used to in Tartarus, but if she wanted to see her friend, it was a necessary trip. The meadows were filled with the souls of man, those who hadn’t completed any heroic deeds but didn’t need the sanctuary of Nyx’s depths. While it was called the meadows, that was slightly misleading as it stretched as far as the eye could see. Asphodel was one large meadow, but it included a wood and the rivers Lethe and Styx on either side.
She didn’t mind the souls—they were often friendly and gave her warm smiles as she passed. It was the attention. Over the last few centuries, she had forgotten what it felt like to have all eyes on her. There was only one temple left dedicated to Nyx. It was in Litochoro, and she had shrouded it in permanent darkness to protect her acolytes. She viewed those women as her friends and could hardly remember what it felt like to be worshipped or to be looked upon with reverence. As she glided through Asphodel, she was reminded.
There was a fleeting moment when she thought she understood Erebus, until she realized that all he needed was to walk through the meadows; he didn’t need to go to war to find worshippers.
Gods.Nyx shook her head as her thoughts raced.They’ve gotten to Erebus and given him an ego. He used to laugh at the things those other men got up to.
There had been a time when Erebus was more stoic, the silent sword to her commands. An enforcer under the cover of her night. She didn’t recognize the primordial who had stood in front of her, begging her to go to battle withZeus.Their stilted conversation earlier that day proved that there was no middle ground between them anymore, leaving a hole in Nyx’s chest that was widening rapidly, pushing her to return to Asphodel and seek out her friend.
As Nyx moved towards the forest that ran alongside Lethe, she wondered what would happen if a primordial drank from its waters. Most of the souls that came to Tartarus sipped water from Lethe, the river of forgetfulness and oblivion, to remove the traumatized memories of their past lives. They would then go rest in Tartarus until they were ready to be reborn.
If I just…
Nyx almost gasped out loud, her own thoughts shocking her. She had never considered drinking the waters of Lethe before…but there was a growing panic in her body. There was a terrible sense of foreboding that crowded her mind, making it hard to see her own reason. She was nervous about losing Erebus.
What would that… What would that even mean? Losing Erebus… He’s… I mean, we’re…Even her thoughts were disjointed.
Nyx pushed the feeling from her mind as she wove in and out of the trees. There were less souls in this part of Asphodel, the human notion ofbeing afraid of the woodsapparently never went away. The air was thick with the scent of daffodils and narcissus. It calmed Nyx. Dark waves of nightfall slithered through the trees as she descended upon the middle of a small clearing, an elaborate stone home in the very center.
Nyx had always thought it pedestrian that her friend had wanted a homestead like a human, instead of simply existing in her goddess form. It was one of the only things different between them.
