Willa smiles. “Yeah, I really like it. It’s busy. Kingston’s as much of a workaholic as me. But there’s always a new challenge or something different to do, but also with a sense of familiarity, if that makes sense. I don’t know…Does that make me high-maintenance?”
I shake my head. “No, I think it means you’ve found what you like to do. And that makes me really happy for you.”
“What about you?” Willa asks.
“I’m enjoying the vet office I’m at. I think it’s a good challenge. Turns out, they service a lot of large animals out here, so that’s been interesting. I’ve been working with a lot of horses and even an alpaca recently.”
“I know you were hoping there would be some of that here, so I’m glad you’re getting to do what you enjoy.” Willa shudders. “I still remember you telling me about the pig C-section.”
I grimace. “I’m sorry. I’ll try not to share the gory details. But I am really happy here.”
Willa studies me for a minute. “Then why do you look so stressed?”
I spin the coffee cup around as I debate how to answer her. Willa is finally settled for the first time in a long time in her life, and I’m stuck paying off my big loan. I could tell her about it in vague terms—maybe. I am trying to be a better communicator in this relationship.
“I have a big student loan to pay off. Another company took it over, and the APR increased. I’m honestly really grateful to be living with Miles right now. I’d likenotto pay interest for the rest of my life on this loan. I’m also starting out on a trial basis here at the clinic for the first six months, so my pay isn’t as high.”
Willa looks concerned. “Do you need help? Because I don’t have a lot, but I could at least help a little.”
I smile at her brightly. “Oh, no, no. I’m just sitting here, complaining to you like a sister. This isn’t a do-or-die moment.”Even though I feel like I’m drowning.
“Are you sure? You’re not thinking about selling a kidney to pay this off, are you?” she asks with a laugh.
No, but I am considering getting married to help pay it off, I think to myself. But I can’t tell her that.
I can’t even tell her about the student loan in detail because she’ll find out that I’ve been lying to her for years. The student loan isn’t mine. It’s Willa’s. I let her think that she got ascholarship, and I took a loan out in my name to pay for her bachelor’s degree. I’ve been paying it off ever since.
“Okay, well, as long as it’s not something big. Thank goodness. You had me scared there for a minute. You know those moments where life is going great and you’re just waiting for the shoe to drop?” Willa asks.
“Yes, I do know that feeling.”
“That’s exactly how I feel right now,” Willa admits.
Well, now I definitely can’t tell her anything about it.
And given how she handled finding out that I was living with Miles, maybe it would be better not to tell her that I’m going to marry him.
“Why don’t you tell me all about the new project you’re gonna work on?” I ask her, then take a long sip of coffee.
It’s better just to enjoy my time with my sister. No need to burden her with something she can’t change.
SEVENTEEN
Lucy
Miles stopped by the courthouse five days later and picked up the paperwork we needed to be legally married. I’m nervous, but still not too scared to actually back out.
I don’t know if I should give myself more time to consider this or not, but honestly, it seems like the light at the end of my tunnel. If I could pay off that student loan…I could finally breathe.
“Have you ever planned a wedding before?” I ask Miles.
“Only once.” He takes a long time to sip his coffee.
He was waiting for me when I got home from work, drinking coffee. I’m pretty sure his blood is ninety percent caffeine at this point. I notice he’s using the Stud Muffin cup.
I drop the paperwork on the counter. “What?” I gasp. “You never said anything about an ex-wife!”
Maybe that’s why he doesn’t have someone…his other person died. I open my mouth to ask, but freeze.
