Page 104 of In Love and Revenge

In my head she always has been. And now my heart’s catching up. I’m in danger of falling in love with Aurora Thorne. And that’s fine, as long as she doesn’t fall in love with me back.

Because if she did, then that would be a huge risk against everything I’ve spent years keeping at arm’s length.

But for the first time, something deep inside me is telling me to do it.

To take the risk.

‘There’s more if you want it?’ I offer, looking up from my laptop, where I’m sitting on the floor beside Aurora as she finishes her giant bowl of pasta.

Her attention flicks from the reality TV show she’s watching.

‘Thanks, but I’m good.’ She gives me a tentative smile.

She’s warmed up slowly in my presence since she returned from upstairs. She asked if we could eat in front of the TV, and initially I thought it was to ease the awkwardness she might be feeling being here with me. But the way she’s relaxed more with each mouthful and her eyes have lit up as she’s listened to the people on her show talk non-stop shit, made me realise – this is how she relaxes at the end of the day. And to not only be privy to that, but to be invited to sit beside her while I work, was an invitation I was not going to pass up. Even if my back might kill me tomorrow from sitting on the floor.

‘Thanks for dinner,’ she says.

‘You’re welcome.’ I carry on typing, fully expecting her to go back to watching her programme in silence.

‘You know I’m not staying more than one night, right?’

‘We can talk about tomorrow night tomorrow,’ I reply.

She shifts against the sofa, turning so her body’s angled towards me.

‘You mean, you can try to talk me into it again? What are you going to do? Convince me each day to stay?’

‘If that’s what it takes.’ I frown as I spot a typo in the email I’m composing.

She huffs. ‘You know this is crazy, right? I can’t stay here forever.’

‘I disagree.’

‘Rafael,’ she scoffs, like I’ve said something absurd.

My name from her lips has heat running through my veins.

‘Stay tonight. Then see how you feel.’

She sighs. ‘Fine. I’ll stay tonight, seeing as I’m here now. But that’s it. And we don’t tell Dove about it. At least, not yet. I don’t want her knowing that the reason you insisted I stay here is because I’m poor. Because I’m not. It’s fine. I’m managing just fine. But if she knew where I lived and ...’ Her nose wrinkles. ‘If she knew, then she’d insist I stay with her for free. And I won’t abuse her generosity like that. I’m not a freeloader. But you? You’ll let me pay you back for anything I use while I’m here. Electricity, water, food.’

It’s a statement – albeit a misguided one, so I don’t dignify it with an answer.

Her shoulders relax, taking my lack of reaction as confirmation of agreement.

Of course I won’t take her bloody money. What’s she going to do? Give me her last thirty-seven pounds and fifty-one pence, then write me an IOU for the rest?

‘You admit it, then? That you’re financially disadvantaged right now?’

‘It sounds really weird saying it like that.’ She sighs. ‘I’m fine. I’m coping. But I’m not booking holidays and opening savings accounts, if that’s what you mean.’ The tops of her ears tinge pink and she darts her eyes away from mine.

‘There’s no judgement here, Aurora.’

‘Sure there isn’t,’ she mutters, folding her arms.

‘I am an arsehole at times,’ I admit, ‘but I’ll never be one when you’re being honest with me. I want to know you better. I want to know everything.’

She looks at me warily. ‘No, you don’t.’