25
RETREAT
Tori
Imake it home on autopilot.
Keys in the door, shoes kicked off, I head straight to the couch where I curl up in a ball and stare at the wall as if it might tell me what to do. My phone buzzes in my pocket every few minutes with texts I can’t bring myself to read.
Dana’s words echo in my mind:Him or your career. You can’t have both.
The truth is, I already know what I’m going to do. I’ve known since I walked out of her office with my heart in my throat and my future in pieces on the floor. I’m going to end it. I’m going to tell Zayden we can’t do this anymore, that it was a mistake, that I need to focus on my career and he needs to focus on Maisie. We should just... stop.
It’s the smart choice. The safe choice. The choice that protects everyone.
So why does it feel like I’m about to rip out my own heart?
A knock on my door makes me jump.
I know who it is before I even look through the peephole. I mentioned my building once—complained about the fourth-floor walkup after a long shift—and apparently that was enoughfor him to find me. Zayden stands in the hallway, still in his workout clothes, looking like he drove straight here from the gym. His jaw is tight, his eyes worried, and he’s so unfairly beautiful it makes my chest ache.
I open the door.
“Hey.” His voice is rough. “You weren’t answering your phone.”
“I know. I just...” I step back to let him in because I don’t know what else to do. “It’s been a day.”
“Yeah. I heard.” He moves past me into my apartment, taking it all in—the tiny galley kitchen, the bookshelf overflowing with anatomy textbooks and romance novels I’d die before admitting to, the plants on the windowsill that I somehow keep alive despite everything. His eyes land on the fuzzy blanket bunched up on my couch, where I planned to curl up and die tonight. It’s nothing compared to his place with the big windows, the chef’s kitchen, and the room for Maisie to run around. But it’s mine.
He turns to face me. “Banks told me about the rumors. About Dana pulling you in.”
“Of course he did.”
“Don’t be mad at him. He was trying to help.” Zayden’s eyes lift to mine and his expression hits me right in the chest. “Are you okay?”
“Just peachy.”
“Tori.” He takes a step closer. “Please. Talk to me.” His voice is steady, but the rest of him isn’t. There’s a crease between his eyebrows that I want to smooth away with my thumb.
“Dana gave me an ultimatum. You or my career.” I force myself to meet his eyes, but the rehearsed words get tangled on the way out. “I’ve been sitting here trying to figure out how to do the right thing. For both of us.”
“The right thing.” He repeats it flatly.
“The smart thing. The responsible thing.” I wrap my arms tighter around myself. “Maybe we should just... stop. Before this gets any harder. You go back to your life, I go back to mine, and we pretend—”
“No.”
“Zayden—”
“I said no.” He closes the distance between us, and suddenly he’s right there, close enough that I can see the gold flecks in his eyes. “You don’t get to make this decision for both of us.”
“Someone has to be rational here.”
“This isn’t rational. This is you running scared.”
“I’m trying to protect—”
“I don’t need protection. I need you to stop shutting me out.” His voice cracks on the last word, and something in my chest cracks with it. “I’m not willing to walk away from this without seeing where it could go. Are you?”
