“That’s not fair,” I say defensively, feeling my cheeks heat with protective sibling fury.
“I know you don’t like to hear it, but—”
“You don’t understand.”
“So make me understand,” she says, digging into the dessert. “Why do you put up with his shit?”
“You weren’t there when we were growing up. Our home life was f’d up.”
“Whose wasn’t?”
“Anita, you grew up in a mansion. You had maids and a damned butler.”
She shrugs. “Yeah, and I spent more time with them than my parents. You think that doesn’t mess a person up?”
“Okay, fair.” I meet her eyes and try to remind myself that privilege doesn’t always equal happiness. “Our home life was messed up in… other ways. I looked after Benjamin like a mother sometimes.”
“So you feel, like, some sort of motherly instinct, is that it?” She narrows her eyes, then points at the cheesecake. “You gonna eat any of this?”
I take the second fork, and hover over the cake, but don’t dig in. “It’s not just that. When it came down to it, Benjamin was my protector too. More than once, he took a beating from our father that was meant for me.”
That makes her pause. She stares at me. “Jesus Christ.”
I nod. “Like I said, messed up. He defended me from my father, and stepped in and took when my father’s friends would try to get me to sit on their laps and…All I could do was run, hide and cry, and then get him ice and aspirin and Band-Aids.”
She draws a deep breath. “I’m sorry.”
I shake my head. “I wouldn’t have ever told you, but…”
“But I opened my big mouth and started talking about shit I have no right to.”
“No. You’re right in a way. His life is a disaster, and he brings on the chaos. But I can’t just stand by and watch him get hurt.” I take a bite of the creamy cheesecake. “Anyway, you asked about King.”
“Who?”
“King Hertzof.” I watch her face for any recognition, then start to laugh. “The hockey dude.”
“Oh, right! Yeah, the hockey dude. I looked him up. Very nice… stick.” She giggles.
And like that, the conversation about my past and my brother is forgotten. I’ve known Anita long enough to know she doesn’t dwell on the negatives. It’s something I love about her, even if it rubs other people up the wrong way. At least this way, I’m not left upset over memories from the past.
“So… how are things going with him?”
“Annoying.”
She stabs at the decadent dessert, bringing a bite to her mouth while giving me ‘the look’.
“That’s it. Annoying. I mean…” I throw one hand up while digging into the cheesecake with her, holding the bite on my fork in front of my mouth. “I just… He’s sort of infuriating.”
She smiles, chewing away with that knowing look in her eyes. We eat another bite in silence as that butterfly feeling twitters below my belly button.
Anita takes a gulp of her coffee, holding it in one hand, the fork in the other, crossing her arms as she watches me chew.
“What?” I blurt, mouth still full, turning my hands up.
“Did you kiss him?” She narrows her dark eyes at me. Her sleek black hair falls forward as she lowers her chin, straight dark tendrils brushing her jawline. She stares at me for a moment, then, “You did!” she bursts, and my head falls back as I groan at the ceiling. “Shit. Fuck. You kissed him and—”
“Stop looking at me!” I snap, turning away. She can read me like no one else.
