I did.
“Peter couldn’t admit he was in pain,” she said, “so he burned down chapels and built bombs, and didn’t last till sophomore year. His death made Sebastian sad and quiet, except for spilling our deepest secret to the Lindqvists. Then our little prodigy got a bump on the head and fell apart. It’s coming for all of us—Uncle Max’s axe is still swinging! It will keep swinging until wemake it stop!”
At the anguished cry of those last three words, a thunder of feet came down the hallway. The door flung open, and the horde stared at us, appalled by the sight of the broken teacup.
“Coventry?” I suggested.
Gertie flung out an arm. “You heard!”
The pod scuttled away, subdividing into its various rooms, mice scattering at the yowl of a cat.
Gertie waited for the last door to slam, then spoke in a steely voice I’d never heard before. “Tell me everything.”
“Okay.” I stood and closed the door again, returned to my seat, took a deep breath. “Loud noises make me jump. Being alone makes me sad. Playing poker with my dorm sisters makes me happy. Music does all those things. I became friends with a sick kid in the hospital, and she writes to me now, real letters on paper. I’m worried about her. I care about her.”
“Butwhy? And don’t say the accident.”
I took a slow breath.
“Because I was in love with Hiromi.” In the corner of my vision, Sebastian froze a little.
Gertie caught it, and slowly looked from me to him. “Are you two…banging?”
“Yes,” he said, like it was a relief.
“Finally! Something one didn’t already know.”
“You thinkthat’sthe important part of all this?” I asked.
“Yes, because you’re keeping it a secret. If the elders knew, Jessica, you’d be untouchable, regardless of blabberings from Faraday Wilbert-Lee. You two together has been Grandma’s wet dream since we were kids!”
I opened my mouth to argue, but Sebastian took my hand. Gertie watched his fingers interlace with mine, mesmerized.
“We don’t want them to know,” he said.
“Don’t you?” She dragged her gaze from our hands back to me. “Remember the first big family meeting after Sebastian arrived? We were out in the Barrow Marsh, with Katie, when the bell rang. A few weeks after you killed Rabbit.”
“Sebastian wanted to go with me,” I said.
“So did we! But we knew the rule: no curae, no meetings. But our new cousin already wanted to do everything you did.”
“Please stop,” Sebastian said.
“He wanted tobeyou, Jessica. He pleaded for you to take him along. You treated him like an ordinary:You’re not a Morton yet. When he started weeping, you just stared harder because you never cried. Do you remember how cruel you were?”
“I remember. This is important why?”
“Because of what we did later, the three of us. We acted like nothing had happened. Like Sebastian hadn’t cried. Like we didn’t care that Prodigy Jessica got to play with the grown-ups while we collectedfucking mushrooms. You looked so confused. Katie could barely keep from giggling.”
“You took his side,” I said. “Sebastian has always been good at making people take his side.”
Gertie smiled. “No, Jessica. It wasmyidea.”
I looked at Sebastian for confirmation.
He shrugged. “She asked if I wanted revenge. I thought you’d been horrible. I didn’t understand yet that you were just being…Jessica.”
“No,” I sighed. “I was being cruel. I wanted to be better than you.”
