“Well, you mustn’t worry about me,” she promised. Her own smile was more forced than natural, but she was thinking too much at the moment to consider her own happiness. But then she inhaled deeply. Reflection had her going on to say, “Matters were surprisingly easy. Easier than I anticipated, I mean. However, I would say we have found our rhythm.”
“Do you like him?”
“My husband?”
Elowen nodded, fumbling with her tea cup. “Yes, the duke. Do you like the gentleman you married? I would think it could make life easier.”
She spoke gently as she answered, “Yes, it would. It does. We worked well together.”
Something about her words must have caught her sister’s attention. Scooting to the edge of her seat, Elowen set down her cup, then Verity’s cup, and took her hands in her own. “I knew it. Something is the matter. Did something happen? Has he mistreated you?”
Warmth flooded her face; for all Verity thought she could hide her feelings, she found she was not very good at it after all. “Not at all.”
“Then what went wrong?”
Verity forced a nod, tight at her entire body felt. She attempted to smile as well but couldn’t tell if it did any good. But perhaps some honesty would help. It was best her sister had some understanding about marriage since she would surely make a match of her own soon.
“I’m afraid that things are no longer what they were,” she admitted. “But this wasn’t a marriage made on love. You know this. It’s simply a proper match. The more I came to know His Grace, the more I… the more things changed.”
“So he has hurt you?”
“Not in the way you expect. Perhaps it was my fault.” Verity winced at the memory of her night in the library. “We nearly kissed, Elowen, that’s all.”
Elowen studied her. “I don’t understand. By all accounts, kisses should be pleasant. Or are you saying he forced you?”
“No! Not at all. It’s only that the duke now acts as though nothing happened. Like we are strangers. And it’s so very uncomfortable living with a stranger,” Verity added. She blinked several times as she suddenly felt her eye begin to itch. Forcing in a deep breath, she tried again to smile. “I hope you will have a better wedding than mine. It shouldn’t be too difficult.”
Frowning, her younger sister gave a quick shake of her head. “I don’t care about weddings right now. Only you. Is this really the union you wish to keep, Verity? You look exhausted in a place where you should be safe. Isn’t there anything that you want?”
She opened her mouth and closed it.
What do I want?
Smatterings of words came to mind. Her journal. A comfortable bed. New slippers. But this wasn’t what her sister was asking. Verity lifted her gaze once more to the door, her heart reaching out for the duke that continued to refuse her.
She finally said, “I want to be a good partner to my husband, and I wish for him to be a good partner to me.”
Footsteps sounded in the hall where she eyed the open door. Was it him? Maybe he was returning. Maybe he would include her after all, no longer ignoring her.
Only it was a servant passing by. Verity sighed, slumping.
Although the words were simple enough to say, something about them felt false on her ears. It wasn’t enough. Was it even true? Her heart thumped at the thought of seeing Dominic even when he wasn’t around. There were so many things she wanted. At the end of the day, it was hard to put into words.
It was more of a feeling. She wanted to feel Dominic sitting beside her. He never came closer to her anymore. He didn’t allow the firelight to consume him, his hand to get close to hers, and he certainly didn’t look at her for very long.
But she still remembered the way he had looked at her. With more than fondness or compassion, but with adoration. With hunger…
Would she ever see that again in Dominic?
CHAPTER 27
“What is this?”
Dominic quietly exhaled as he reentered his study, sitting down as Cassian began to pace about on his favorite rug.
The viscount’s motions were harsh and quick but controlled. Cassian had never looked so angry. So fearful. This couldn’t be blamed. He hadn’t known. How Cassian managed to avoid such conversations, Dominic couldn’t imagine. Was Cassian more a recluse than he knew?
A pointless question because they had bigger problems now, big enough that couldn’t be ignored.
