twenty-six
Autumn
“Ijustwantoneselfie, Sawyer—get back over here.” Nat chased an oblivious Sawyer down and pulled out her phone, ready to snatch a photo with them.
This was the last day for our campers, but our staff was also running out of time. Most of us would be separating after our end-of-summer reset once campers had left on Thursday. Some staff might return next year, but the majority would probably move on.
Move on. That was a painful pill to swallow.
The counselors had all gathered for a quick fifteen-minute huddle before dinner. Hazel organized stacks of photos for each of us. I drew little swirls on my notebook, like I wasn’t saying goodbye to all of these people I’d grown close with for the past several months.
I was terrible at goodbyes.
Lamar cleared his throat beside me. “Looking forward to the offseason?”
“Yep.” I nodded. “There’s a lot to do during the year, but it’s nothing like this.”
We hosted Outdoor School for local middle schools and held corporate retreats, and then there was recruitment and setup for next year. Jack would work on new cabins, and I would run events alongside Hazel and Leo. It wasn’t better or worse than our summer sessions. It was just different. Quieter.
Sometimes, I liked the quiet, but this time, it felt like it would be harder to enjoy.
“What about you? Where are you off to?”
“I have a job lined up with an adventure excursion company.” Lamar dipped his head, but I could tell that mixed in with the sorrow was excitement. “I think this is my last season here.”
I nodded regretfully, knowing that was where this conversation was headed thanks to the guilty look on his face. Lamar was a popular counselor and had been with us for two years before this. He worked in eastern Oregon during the offseason, and he loved it there.
“You’re going to love that new job. Do they have river rafting?” I’d learned asking questions was the perfect distraction from dealing with sorrow, and this was no exception.
“That’ll be my role, actually. Full time during rafting season and camping during the rest of the year. Who knows? Maybe I’ll pick up a new hobby like free climbing while I’m at it.”
“That sounds amazing. Minus the camping in the rain and snow.”
“Come visit me and we’ll see how you feel about it after.”
“Or I could do anything else.” I preferred enjoying the wilderness from the comfort of my cabin during the rain and snow seasons. I smiled at him and took his hand in mine. “I’ll come visit, though, I promise.”
Lamar had been one of my favorites. He was funny at all times and a great listener, and he made the best chili I’d ever had. Healways had dog videos to show me, and I wished I had one of those right now because my eyes were starting to well up.
The atmosphere was mostly cheerful, which had me in a different mode, like I was on a sitcom where the main character was looking back on both sad and happy memories leading up to the big finale. But there was no big moment for me. I would be staying back and working my dream job. It was just the people that would change.
Thank goodness Hazel, Leo, and Jack were staying too.
Things were wrapping up, and we were about to go over announcements, but in a rare show of indifference, Jack turned from Nat as he saw her approaching him and walked away from her. A look of dejection spread across her face, but she played it off, turning to Felicia and walking arm and arm to the other side of the table. I tried to get his attention with my eyes, but he slumped into his seat beside me and stared at his pile of photos.
“Okay, everyone, we are in the home stretch. Last day, last dinner, last campfire.” Hazel walked behind us, passing out the remaining bundles of photos for counselors to hand out. They took painstaking effort to make sure every camper left with images of their friends and their best moments captured at camp. “I know there’s a wave of melancholy going through this group right now, but our focus needs to be on positive end to this session and the season. Then, atourfinal campfire, we cry.” Like there was any choice in the matter. “Once we finish with housekeeping tomorrow, we’ll break for staff dinner and campfire. Now, does anyone have any updates?”
Afteramostlycheerlessmeeting, I headed to my cabin to get a refresher, maybe even a mini depression nap before dinner. That was, until I made it to my pod.
They were already waiting for me. Shit.
Kell-i, Kell-y, Janna, Irene, and Diego were gathered at our small campfire, laughing and crying with each other as I approached.
“There she is,” Kell-y shouted, already a little sauced, if the two empty bottles of wine situated on the outdoor table were an indication of anything. “Autumn. Sit down.” She sounded exasperated, with flawless drunk girl desperation.
I plopped into an Adirondack and was handed a cup of the good stuff.
“Kell-y was telling us about your camp boyfriend,” Janna slurred happily. “We heard you went on a date today.”
