“Can you explain?” she asked quietly, her face serious and compassionate. It was an interesting contrast to her outfit. The pajamas were printed with multi-colored cows and chickens and made him smile. That was more like the Amaryllis he knew.
“I joined up as a kid. Not by choice. I got in a barroom brawl when I was eighteen. I was barely legal to drink in Alberta and got into a fight over a woman. There was this brute shoving around his girlfriend. I stepped in and stopped him. It got out of hand. We were both arrested. He went to jail, but the judge gave me a choice. Sign up or do time. Even I wasn’t stupid enough to get myself a criminal record when there was a way to avoid it. I enlisted. I don’t even know if he had the power to demand I serve, but I wasn’t risking jail by refusing.”
“That seems a good decision. You should be proud of yourself for stepping up to protect her, especially since it extracted such a big cost.”
Her praise put a lump in his throat. He’d only done what any man would do. “Unfortunately, it didn’t cure me of stupidity. A couple years later, I managed to get a woman pregnant. I was twenty-two. I was an idiot and totally full of myself. I did the right thing. I married her.”
“And? What aren’t you saying?”
“Kiya and I were happy, until we weren’t.” He winced at the rudeness in his tone. He hated talking about his past.
“Kai-ah? That’s a pretty name. You’re not married any longer?”
“She died.” He swallowed down his guilt. He was completely culpable in her death. It was his fault. “In a car accident after an argument.”
“Oh no, that’s terrible. I’m so sorry for your loss.” She rose and hugged him. After a long comforting moment, she sat back down, her hands twisted together on her lap. “Nobody should lose someone they love. Where is your child?”
“Kiya was still pregnant. Due any day.” He couldn’t admit that while they’d been almost happy, comfortable, but not in love. It was a marriage of convenience. “When I broke my leg, I was at the end of my tour. In the hospital, I did a lot of thinking and decided I wanted to be around to father my child. Being a part-time dad didn’t sit well with me. I resigned. Kiya was annoyed that I didn’t ask first. We fought. She said she was going to see her mom. She never made it.”
He still regretted leaving the army without discussing it with her first. Jobless, he’d returned to Snowy Hollow and their home for the remainder of his convalescence. A month later, he was just starting to regain his mobility but was still jobless and angry with the world. In one particularly dark moment, he picked that fatal fight.
He was a jerk. Kiya had deserved better.
They fought, she got in the car, and he never saw her again. His guilt was too strong to confess the true depth of his guilt to Amaryllis.
Amaryllis walked to his side, wrapped her arms around him again and rubbed his back. “I’m so sorry, you must be heartbroken to lose them both.”
“How about that cocoa?” he blurted, wiggling out of her much too welcome embrace.
She looked at him, half squinting, hands on her hips. “That’d be great. I’d love some.” Her expression left no doubt that he’d face more questions later, even if she was letting him off the hook now. He appreciated the break and consideration, even if he felt compelled to share more.
Chapter Five
Rill wrapped her armsaround herself. Owen’s tragedy struck home in too many ways. The loss of her parents surged fresh in her heart. As did the fact that she rarely came home. Her aunt was the last of her family and they barely ever saw each other. It was entirely Rill’s fault. She needed to change that. She needed to find a new life balance that included her aunt.
She hurt for Owen and for herself. What if Auntie O passed while Rill was in the city? His pain made her rethink her friendships. Would any of her friends miss her while she was away? Would anyone besides her boss?
