“Thank you. Was that so hard?”
Her shoulders slumped as her gaze wandered to nothing in particular, as if she were looking internally instead of at anything in the room. “Actually, yes. It was even harder than I thought it would be.”
Her disquiet disturbed Julien. Enough to penetrate the hardness he was so desperately trying to maintain. There was a story behind the curve of her spine and the way she seemed to have gone into herself.
He sat down beside her and weighed the pros and cons of reaching out and placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. Asking her if she wanted to talk about whatever had suddenly caused her distress.
But then her gaze came back into focus, and her posture snapped into place. When she looked at him, sadness touchedher honey-hued eyes and the barest hint of a defensive snarl curled her lips. “But that’s what you’re paying me for, right?”
Now it was his turn to feel slapped. Except in his case, he deserved it. The sales tax on that price tag.
Losing any chance he might have had with Martha would be the hidden fee.
18
Julien resisted the urge to rub his temples. His head was pounding, his jaw ached, and he just wanted this day to be done. He’d have to ask Javier at the front desk if the hotel could go into his room and cover up the mirrors because he didn’t think he’d be able to look himself in the eyes.
He forced himself to push his lips into a semblance of a smile. It felt plastic and insincere on his face, and by the way Jessica Baker’s fingers fluttered and eyes widened in panic, he knew she realized he was about to cut her time off.
But he only had three more days to find a diamond in the rough, a needle in a haystack. He couldn’t waste a second by gifting a writer his precious time when she so obviously wasn’t what he was looking for.
He held out his hand for her to shake. “Thank you so much for meeting with us, Ms. Baker.”
Her gaze jumped between his and Martha’s. “But ... but I haven’t even shown you the book pages yet,” she protested. “It’s not long. You can thumb through them in just a few short minutes.”
“I’m sorry, but Squire has decided to veer away from illustrated picture books at this time.”
Her chin began to tremble. “But ... your website. There isn’t anything listed. And when I signed up ... nothing.”
Her sentences were choppy as she tried to make sense of the unexpected turn her meeting had taken. She’d get there eventually, the belief that Julien had wasted her time and one of her few opportunities this weekend to possibly get published.
In his defense, he hadn’t come to that decision until three pitches ago. He’d overheard the editor at the table next to his break down the cost margins, something he berated himself for not looking into before. Even though editing costs were lower with a picture book, that savings didn’t offset the financial burden of high-quality illustrations and elevated printing expenses.
“I’m sorry,” he said again, hoping this time she’d walk away without any more protest and save them both a touch of dignity.
If he had any left to save.
“Ms. Baker.” Martha crushed his hopes by speaking up and stopping the author’s departure. She twisted in her seat to look at the tables behind them. When she turned back around, her eyes held a firm determination. “Do you see that lady two tables back? The one in the houndstooth blazer?”
Jessica Baker’s gaze lifted over Martha’s shoulders, her brows coming down in confusion. “Yes?”
“That is Anna Shephard, acquisitions editor for Seedling Press. She seems to have a break in her schedule at the moment, so I want you to go over there and introduce yourself. Tell her that Squire sent you and that while we’ve decided to go in a different direction, we think you’d be a perfect fit for their brand. They specialize in board books and early childhood picture books, if you aren’t aware.”
“I know. They’re my dream publisher, but all their spots were filled by the time I signed up for the conference.”
“Well, now’s your chance.” Martha smiled her encouragement.
“Are you sure? Is it really okay to just walk over there?” Jessica hesitated.
“You have to take what you want, Ms. Baker. Never let an opportunity pass you by,” Julien chimed in. If he could get her to vacate the chair she was currently in, he could wave over one of the other aspiring authors loitering along the perimeter walls.
“Okay.” She stood, the same excitement she’d had when she’d first approached them back in her demeanor. “Thank you.”
Martha squeezed her hand. “Good luck.”
She whisked past them, clutching her folder of information to her chest.
Julien made eye contact with a man who looked to have about ten extra years of experience compared to Julien and waved him over. They’d been striking out with the women writers. Maybe the bestseller he was searching for had been penned by a man.
