He wished he could tell Mellie right now that he never wanted to see her again.
But Zayne had so little to offer Kira. It was better for her to think he had promised himself to Mellie. Kira was too convincing and surprising. He never knew how she might test him.
And right now, her breath warmed his collarbone.
There was only one last thing he could give her that he hadn't already. She needed to know, even though it put her in danger.
Zayne worked closer until his mouth brushed her ear so he could speak only to her. “I'm taking you home myself.” Close enough to smell her skin. He held back a groan. “I'm sorry it took so long.”
Needing to breathe, he edged back enough to see her.
Shock widened her eyes. Golden sun kissed her smooth skin and the trail of freckles along her cheeks. For all the time he spent trying not to look at her, he'd still learned all her intricacies.
“Does that mean…” She sounded breathless.
Zayne nodded. “I'm done.”
Pain wound into the emerald of her eyes. “Don't give up the revolution for me.”
The effort of resisting her every second of the day weakened his voice to a whisper. “You are the revolution. I don't know how to win this war, but I know if I watch you die—if I kill you—I've already lost.”
She breathed so heavily now that their bodies nearly touched. And she was giving him that look again.
Staring again. Wanting again.
Pressure and heat clenched his stomach.
When he held her close the night they met, she fit so well nestled against him. He could feel himself smoothing his hands along her again. Could imagine how her plush thighs would have felt if she'd wrapped them around him in the kitchen when they argued and she wore that little skirt. Or her hips in that green dress. That torturous dress he hated for how it made him want to grab every curve it hugged so perfectly.
Those memories lurked around the edges of his mind.
No looking or it became real. No remembering.
Kira made him burst with the nameless and the unspoken.
With the forbidden.
“You'll lose all this power,” Kira whispered so quietly, it forced him to read her lips, and he really needed to look anywhere else right now.
“What good is my power if it can't save you?” He shook his head. “If it couldn't save Mom?
She bit her bottom lip. “The empire…”
“Fuck this entire empire. I'll burn it down and toss its ashes. I'm taking you home and making sure no one hurts you ever again.”
“This isn't something you'll be able to undo.”
“You told me to find an ounce of joy and protect it with all I have,” Zayne whispered. “That's what I'm doing.”
Kira was far more than an ounce of joy. After fighting his entire life, he didn't know how to win this war, but he believed in her. So maybe he waited all these years to find her.
Maybe protecting Kira at all costs would teach him how to destroy the Phaedra.
In all honesty, it didn't matter anymore.
Right and wrong didn't matter.
She mattered.
