“And what’s that?”
“Continuing to lose everything I’ve worked for. To scrape it together and lose it all, time and again.” I finally look his way as we pass under the trees of River Park once more. “This is going to be it, Kaelis. There is no going back after this year. I’m going to find out how to make the vessel, and then I’ll use it to summon and cast the World.”
Kaelis nods slowly, understanding illuminating those fathomless eyes even in the growing night. He doesn’t immediately proffer information on the vessel, but I’m not sure whether I can assume that means he knows nothing. “Let us end it, then.”
“Let us remake the World into something that can never be taken from us again,” I whisper, even though it feels as loud to me as a scream.
The darkness is all-consuming and we slow to a stop. He’s barely visible in the distant lamplight. The hood shadows his expression. But I know every curve of his face and I nearly move to touch his strong jaw.
My throat is dry. My hands twitching to grab his. To pull him to me. This is the second time I’ve wanted to kiss him. And, just like before, I’m at a loss. Trapped somewhere between what we could be and all the misconceptions I once had about him.
Do I need to hold back any longer? Or can I touch him as freely as my heart desires?
Before I can find the answers, he steps back.
“Very well,” he says finally, nods, and starts walking again, as if making it a point to leave me behind. “Tell me of your plans to make yourself my newest professor.”
For the entire walk back, I outline my ideas for how I am going to, once more, infiltrate Arcana Academy as Oricalis’s most wanted.
Chapter 31
About a week later, I meet Vaduin at a cafe outside the academy I’d always wanted to try. It’s at the end of Silver Street—somewhere I’d pass from time to time whenever I left Rot Hollow. But I’d never had the funds before to carelessly spend on rare teas and extravagantly fancy little cakes.
Now I have access to the deep coffers of an Oricalis prince and have absolutely no qualms about spending the crown’s coin.
“You are an industrious woman, Sophie Veillgar,” Vaduin says as he takes his seat across from me. He’s dressed in finery for the reopening of the academy. Today is the Fire Festival, the celebration of the season of creativity, passion, boldness, and forward movement.
I pour cold tea for us both—steeped the night before to avoid igniting fire today, as is customary for the day of the Fire Festival—and smile, quite self-satisfied indeed. “I will not let you down, Head Professor.”
“You should know I still have reservations regarding this approachfor you to help me conduct research.” He lifts the cup to his lips, narrowing his eyes over it.
“I know.” I take a sip of tea. We’ve been back and forth. “But having you vouch for me will give me full freedom of movement.”
“Me vouching for you…” he repeats thoughtfully. “Do you make it a habit of finding successful men to hide behind?” He means Kaelis.
Was that supposed to be an attack?Oh, Vaduin, if you want to attack me, you’ll have to try harder.“Hiding behind? I’m not hiding in the slightest. From where I sit, I’ve had two successful men gladly bend to my will at a word.”
He chuckles. His smile relaxes, and he taps the table just like he would his desk during discussions on theory when he was quizzing the class. He’s more pleased with this approach than he lets on.
We pass the time in conversation. It occurs to me that this is the first time I’ve ever really spoken to the man without other forces weighing on me. Forces that made me leery, skeptical, or distant from learning about him objectively.
Vaduin is a scholar, through and through. At one point he alludes to how he found the Worldkeepers. “I know a great deal about this world. So when I find something interesting to me, it’s a rare and special thing indeed.”
The implication is not lost on me. Even with all of the information Mother hinted at and outright gave me. Bristara’s clues. The Worldkeepers looking out for me…I never found them until they revealed themselves to me. Whereas he was able to seek them out.
I mostly stay quiet and enjoy my tea, listening to the information he freely offers. I learn how he picked up his love for knowledge as a young boy—from all the people who went through Traveler’s Rest on their way to the inner sea along the Farlum River, and from being so close to Clans Hanged Man and Hermit. He speaks with wistful longing and bitter sorrow about Clan Hermit’s library, a legendary place that was said to house nearly all the knowledge of the world…And that was destroyed by Kaelis.
At last, he stands. “It’s time.”
I do not miss my chance to spend Kaelis’s coin, placing the money on the table for us both.
The moment we turn onto the main road, we meet with a long line of people stretching between Starburst Row and Silver Street. Mothers and fathers clutch their initiates close. Students intermingle, far more relaxed and confident than the initiates. Most of them I recognize, especially when my gaze lands on Luren, Sorza, and Dristin. None of them looks my way.
Then I see less-friendly visages: Nidus and Cael, the Tower and Emperor Majors, respectively. They were Eza’s left- and right-hand men, but I saw little of them after Emilia ended Eza’s life.
My gaze swings back over the sea of students and sticks on one more person: Thal. At once, I remember what they said about their Major.It can erase pain.My thoughts return immediately to Arina.They could help her…But would Thal want to? And would Arina?
The questions swirl as we arrive at the front of the line, among the Old Ruins right before the gate. The academy looms in the distance, as imposing as it has always been, a void against the hazy mountains. I take my place with the other professors, exchanging brief introductions, as Vaduin moves on to the front of the line.
