I inwardly groan. I’ve got it so bad.
“Yeah,” I say, trying to sound as nonchalant as him.
“Well,” he says. “I was just realizing that…it wasn’t so hard. Leaving. And I wish we had more time in Skye, but…it’s a good reason to come back.” He lifts a hand, rubbing the back of his neck. “I’ve been thinking, actually, about traveling more. When I was in therapy, back when I was doing it regularly, it was something we talked about. I basically stopped traveling after James, but I think…I think I’m ready to start doing it again.”
I want to reach for him, take his hand, but I know doing that would make him nervous, so I keep holding on to the wheel.
“That’s great,” I tell him, my voice soft. “I think that’s really great.”
He looks at me from under his lashes. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” I say. “I understand. Why that would have been hard for you. And I think, well—” I smile at him, my eyes finding his. “It’s really brave.”
Some of the tension between his brows eases. “Thanks. I thinkit would help to get back into therapy again too, but I just feel…like I want to do this. Like I want totry.”
“I’m glad,” I say. “Would you—I remember you mentioned Greece before, but maybe…I don’t know. A trip back to Skye could be nice. Closer.”
“Yeah. Or, I was thinking, maybe I could come out to Los Angeles.”
My heart stops in my chest.
“You want to visit L.A.?”
“I want to visityou.” A beat. “I know what you said before, but…would you be open to that? If I came out to see you—”
“Yes.” Something loose and giddy rises within me. “Yes, I’d like that.”
A car flies past us, and Jacob’s hand extends toward me, dropping onto my knee. “Can we pull over?” he asks, and I nod.
I want to look at him while we have this discussion, and perhaps it’s making him nervous. He can sense how distracted I am, and it’s probably better—for both of us—to say this to each other when I’m not driving. To speak to each other face-to-face.
I follow the signs for the closest gas station—convenient because we do need to refill—and have barely put the car in park when I feel Jacob’s fingers at my chin and his mouth over mine.
“What—” My mouth opens to speak, but then I taste him, and all coherent thoughts leave my head. We spent all night together, have been around each other all morning, but I can’t get enough of him. I’m insatiable, unbuckling my seat belt, drawing him closer, my hand firm around the back of his neck.
“I thought,” he says, the words a breath over my lips. “I thought you’d say no.” He kisses me again, hard and quick.
“To what?”
“To me visiting.” He pulls back, planting a kiss in the curve of my neck. “I thought you didn’t want to—that this was it.”
“I—” My fingers curl in the fabric of his shirt, my eyes sliding shut as his mouth opens against my skin. “I thought that would be easier.”
“Easier for who?”
“I—I don’t know.” His mouth returns to mine, soft and gentle. As he retreats, he pulls on my bottom lip with his teeth, and it sends a hum across my skin.
“What would it mean?” I ask. “You visiting me?”
His glasses have slipped down the bridge of his nose, and I reach out, adjusting them back into place.
“What would you want it to mean?”
“Well, are you saying you want to…try to date? Or would it just be a continuation of…this? No strings, and just enjoying each other while we have each other, or—”
“Neelu,” he says, the word a whisper, pulled from the corners of his lungs. His eyes flicker with fear and something else, but it settles, and the way he watches me—it’s so vulnerable. So raw. “This hasn’t been strings-free. Nothing about it, from the very first night, has felt that way. Not for me.”
“Really?”
