“And your job?” he asked. “Have you picked out what you’re going to do for the spring play?”
“I have.” She walked quietly beside him for a few seconds. “But I think it’s going to be my last one.”
“Really?” He looked over at her in surprise.
“Yeah. I think I’m…Well, it was your idea, actually.”
“What do you mean?”
“I took your advice and tried writing a few songs, and…it works, I think.”
“What works?” he asked, still not understanding.
“The play I’m writing. It’s working a lot better as a musical.” She let out a small laugh. “I honestly haven’t written like this in so long. It just feels…fun. And I think I want to focus on that for a while.”
“You sure you won’t miss rehearsing with the kids?”
“Not one bit.” She laughed again. “I love them, but I never wanted to teach theater. I’m excited to see what we can put together next semester, though.”
“Me too,” he said.
She shot him a sideways glance.
“I mean—” He stopped. He almost took it back or tried to explain it away, but it was true. He wanted to be there in the spring. He wanted to watch them perform. From that same spot backstage. Or from the audience. Really, he just wanted to sit wherever Meghna was. Wherever she happened to be.
He took a deep breath and put his hand back in his pocket, wrapping his fingers firmly around the ring box. It suddenly seemed simple. He wanted to be wherever Meghna was. He didn’t know much more than that, but he needed to tell her the truth: that somehow, without him even realizing it, this arrangement had morphed into something more. Something real. He didn’t know what it would mean for their fake engagement. Or how it would work with him in New York and her in Dallas. Or if he’d be able to give her everything she wanted. But he had to tell her. And find out if she possibly felt the same way.
“We should probably talk about this,” Meghna said.
Karthik’s breath caught. Had she somehow read his mind?
“About what?”
“About our end date.”
He halted mid-step. “What do you mean?”
“Well, you just made it sound like you’d be in Dallas in the spring.” She paused beside him, glancing up quizzically. “And I don’t know. I mean, this was supposed to be our end date. The wedding. Are you…Are you saying you want to keep this going?”
His blood raced. Was she open to that? Continuing their engagement? He swallowed. “Would you want that?” he asked.
“I…” She shook her head. “I don’t know. I don’t think so.”
A sharp pain went through Karthik’s chest.
“I mean, I can’t keep lying to my parents about this. I’ve only felt okay because I knew it would be over soon.” She frowned. “Has something changed? With your mom? Because if you need more time, we can talk about it, but—”
“No,” he said, cutting her off. “I misspoke earlier. About Dallas.Wasn’t thinking.” He gave her a strained smile. “Ending it after the wedding is fine.”
They continued their walk, moving closer and closer to the Parthenon, but Karthik hardly noticed. He was hot. And sweaty. And his stomach…He took a deep breath, trying to ignore the twisting in his gut.
He hadn’t been thinking straight. He couldn’t tell Meghna how he felt. Not now. Not when he’d been thinking about how to confess his feelings and she’d been wanting to know when they could call the whole thing off.
Not that he could blame her. She was being reasonable. More than reasonable. She was sticking to their plan. Their rational agreement. He was the one who couldn’t get a handle on himself.
The ring burned hot and heavy in his coat pocket. He was tempted to get rid of it, to chuck it as far as he could throw, but he curbed the childish impulse. He needed the ring. He needed to fulfill his obligations. He’d promised Meghna that he’d be her “fiancé” for this wedding, and that was exactly what he was going to do.
“I got something for you,” he said, as casually as he could manage. “Just for the wedding. I’ll return it after.”
