Her father leaned against the kitchen counter, his mouth twisting into a frown. “In what way?”
Meghna raised her hands, floundering for a moment. “We’re not…I don’t…I’m not sure that Karthik…I’m not sure he’s ready to get married.”
She heaved out a deep breath. There. It wasn’t the whole truth, but that was as close as she could get to it tonight.
Her father regarded her thoughtfully, his gaze soft. Reflective. He was quiet for a minute, then said, “I know your mother and I have told you the story about how we met.”
Despite her poor mood, Meghna almost smiled at that understatement. Her parents had shared their love story so often that Meghna had almost committed it to memory. Her mother had been the ambitious, loud, high achiever in engineering school and her father the quiet, shy student who’d asked her for help. After many studysessions, and despite their differences in culture and language and background, the two had fallen in love.
“But I don’t know if we’ve ever shared all of it,” her father continued. “We’ve told the short version. The one where everything works out in the end. Because ultimately it did. But when we were in the middle of it…” He gave a small shake of his head. “Your mother was always clear about our relationship. About what it was. Where it could go. She told me from the very beginning that we had to end things once we graduated.”
Meghna’s mouth almost fell open in shock. Her father was right. They’d never told herthisversion of the story.
“Your mother had a lot of dreams. She wanted to move abroad. Attend graduate school in the UK or the States. And she didn’t want to get married. She didn’t want to account for a husband. She didn’t want to factor one in or give up her plans for him.” His lips quirked, his expression growing fond. “I understood that. I understood her fears. But I still hoped. I always hoped for more. I tried to show her that I wouldn’t hold her back. That marriage may have been like that for so many of the women we knew, for so many of the women in our families, but it didn’t have to be like that forus.
“I’d secretly hoped that she would change her mind. That she’d be willing to tell our families about us. That she’d take a risk. Give us a chance to make things work. But then graduation came and…she was direct. To the point. She ended things the way she’d always said she would. She got into a graduate program in Texas, and I had a job offer close to my family. I moved to Chennai. She moved to the U.S. And I thought that was it.”
A small, rueful smile crossed his face. “I cried almost every day for a month. And my parents didn’t understand what was happening. They didn’t understand why I refused every proposal they had for me. Why I refused to even meet any of them. But the thought of marrying someone else…I couldn’t fathom it. I was still so in love with your mother.
“And then, months later, on a completely normal Tuesday, your mother showed up at our house. I still remember what she was wearing. A white salwar kameez with bright blue dots. A blue dupatta draped around her shoulders. Her long dark hair in a single braid down her back.” He shook his head, his eyes glistening. “This brave, bold woman marched right into my family’s household and just said, ‘My name is Radhika and I’m in love with your son.’ ”
Her father’s voice was shaky. Rich with emotion. And tears flooded Meghna’s vision, making everything a bit blurry. “She looked right at me and said, ‘Akshay, I made a mistake. You are my jaan. You are my life, and if you love me too, I need you to move to the U.S. with me.’ ” He laughed. “Even in the middle of a heartfelt apology, she was demanding. Intense. And I’d never loved her more. She called me ‘jaan’ for the first time that night. I didn’t know what it meant, but then she told me.Life.”
He shook his head. “It seemed strange to call a person ‘life.’ But your mother explained that when we were apart, she felt like she was living without a piece of her soul. Something necessary for her to breathe. And she never wanted to feel like that again.”
Her father hastily wiped a tear from his eye. “I thought I understood it then, but now, after years of marriage…I understand it so much more. When your mother smiles, I can feel it. Deep in my chest. And when she’s not happy, when she’s hurting, it’s like I’m hurting too. We’re different from each other. In so many ways. But I would never want to be apart from her. She is my jaan. My life. And when you feel that way about someone, the hard things, the things that make you so different, they’re worth working through.”
Meghna swallowed, her throat tight with emotion. She so badly wanted to feel this way about someone. And if Karthik had been willing to give their relationship a real chance, if he had been willing to try, maybe they could have worked through things. Put their differences aside. Found a path forward. One day, maybe they would have felt this way about each other. Called each other “jaan.”
But Karthik wasn’t interested in anything real. He’d made that perfectly clear.
Her father watched her, a faint note of hesitation crossing his face. “And I know your mother can be hard to understand sometimes. She expresses her love differently. We can both see that you’re…content. With your job. But we want more than that for you. We want you to be excited and passionate about what you do. And while I can see that engineering would never have been that for you, your mother is a little more…single-minded. Her work has given her that kind of joy, and she can’t imagine that everyone doesn’t feel the same. But ultimately, she just wants you to be happy, beta. We both do.”
“Thanks, Dad.” She gave him a hug, then reheated the leftovers her mother had sent, inviting her dad to stay for dinner. As they ate, Meghna debated whether she would share her news about applying for an MFA. She’d planned on waiting until things were final, until she’d been accepted somewhere. But maybe she could share the news earlier. Maybe her father was right. All this time, she’d thought her parents were unhappy because she’d failed to live up to some unreachable standard, but maybe they just wanted her to be happy. Maybe they’d be excited for and proud of her if they saw she was pursuing something she loved.
After her father left, she turned back to her computer, a small kernel of hope growing as she filled out her first application.
Karthik drummed his fingers against his thigh. Jim had just popped out of the conference room to let Karthik know that he and the rest of the interview panel were running a few minutes behind schedule, but they’d be ready for him in a moment.
The delay was unexpected, but not unwelcome. Karthik had been on edge all morning. He was almost grateful to have a few seconds to relax. To calm himself down before going inside.
He’d tried to go through his day like normal. Sipping his lavender latte. Checking his email. Talking with Paul—though that conversation had been far from relaxing.
Paul had barreled into his office early that morning, slightly out of breath. “Dude, I’m so sorry about your engagement.”
Karthik had sighed, leaning back in his chair. “How did you even find out?”
“Your mom told me.”
Karthik’s eyebrows had shot up. “You talked to my mom?”
“Yeah. She left a message with me when you were in that meeting and we got to chatting. She’s awesome.”
“Yeah. I know,” Karthik had replied flatly.
Paul had looked at him in confusion. “What’s the matter? I didn’t think you’d be mad if I talked with your mom. She’s really nice. She asked if I’d had any homemade meals lately and said she’d send something with you next week. I was really looking forward to it, but if it’s not okay—”
“No. No, it’s fine.”
