Ale and Leo looked at each other, then back at Cris. Ale sputtered and shook his head, then took a massive bite of his sandwich.
“What?”
“You expect us to think that’s all there is to this story?” asked Leo.
“Start talking,” said Ale around a mouthful of bread.
Cris told them everything he knew about what the press had been saying about him, including the pieces that Teena had passed along. At first, he was talking fast to divert them away from curiosity about Ellie, but the more he shared, the deeper he got. He told them about how he’d purposely avoided the press and how he knew now that had been a mistake. He ran through the breakup with Violet, the guilt he felt about not accepting their show, and even how being in Chiavari had brought back so many memories of their dad.
“I wish you guys had had at least as much time with him as I did,” he said, clearing his throat of the lump that had settled there. Even the twins stopped eating cookies long enough for their faces to go red. Ale turned his face down and away from his brothers. Cris looked around and began to laugh, even though his eyes burned. What kind of a family had a serious conversation in the parking lot of an Autogrill? When he finally told them that he was going to become an EMT as a first step in a career in medicine, Leo didn’t believe him.
“I’m not saying you can’t do it,” he said. “I just can’t picture it.”
“I can’t, either,” Cris said, scratching the paper label off Ale’s bottle of San Pellegrino. “That’s the problem. I never thought of doinganything else but swimming. I never thought Icoulddo anything else. I started to realize that, after a certain point, I wasn’t swimming because I loved it. I kept going because I thought it was all I had.”
“You can’t possibly think that,” said Leo.
“I don’t anymore. I know I am more than just a waterlogged kid with good genes.”
“Although they are thebestgenes.” Ale grinned.
“I’ll give you that,” Cris laughed. “And I know I don’t have to ask anyone for permission to do what I really want to do, even if it doesn’t make sense to anyone but me.”
“Look, we are really going to miss having you with us—” said Leo.
“You’re gonna miss out on so much fun,” said Ale, still chewing.
“But you have to do what’s right for you, even if we don’t get it yet,” Leo continued.
“Yeah, man. We still love you. I can’t believe someone would voluntarily go back to school, but that’s another story.”
“Especially after the life you’ve had. Holy shit, this would be an awesome reality show!”
“You know what, guys?” Cris grabbed a cookie from the roll. “Not a freaking chance,” he said, popping the whole thing in his mouth.
CHAPTER 21
“Hold this for me, will you?” Greta passed a sleepy Odetta to Ellie while she dug for a bottle of sunscreen in the raffia tote bag between their beach chairs. Ellie reached for little Odie, who didn’t even open her eyes as she was passed from one set of arms to the other. Matilde, the five-year-old, was curled up on a towel behind them in the cool shade of the chairs while the oldest, Ivano, swam with their father. Ellie could not imagine how they kept track of everyone, but she never saw a happier family.
“So, what date did you two settle on for your triumphant comeback show?” Greta squeezed a blob of sunscreen directly on the most prominent point of her belly and rubbed it in. Ellie had filled her in on some of the details from the vineyard trip, but she hadn’t quite worked up to the parts that made her feel like her head was going to pop off.
“We didn’t schedule it yet, but honestly I would do the show right now if we could. I really want to get it out of the way,” Ellie said, shifting Odetta in her lap so that she was out of the sun.
“Why? Afraid you’ll lose your nerve?” Greta laughed, capping the sunscreen bottle and dropping it back into the tote bag. She looked up at Ellie, pulling her sunglasses down off her nose to get a better look. “Oh, you are! El! What’s going on?”
“Nothing. Well, not nothing. I just want to be done—not with my show. I want to keep doing the show. I think,” she said, realizing she wasn’t making sense. Greta reached for Odetta, and Ellie helped her slide the toddler back over to her belly. “I guess everything is more complicated now.”
“Do you want to tell me more about what happened yesterday? Because when I asked you before, you told me the olives were good and you didn’t break any bottles on the way back.”
“And that was true.”
“Ah, but you see, I know you well enough to know that when you actively avoid a topic then it’s probably really important to you. Also, after three babies, I’m pretty good at knowing when someone is full of shit.” Greta smiled.
“I guess I can’t argue with that. But, be aware that I don’t quite know how I feel about anything that I am going to tell you, okay?”
“That’s not a problem. There will not be a quiz later.”
“We sort of kissed yesterday.”
