I don’t doubt at all that he can and will take care of me, in more ways than one. From my peripheral, I can see his hand move higher towards my arm. He wanted to touch me, and I was praying for it, but then he dropped his hand down. When he glanced into my eyes, a moment passed between us before a knock sounded at the door.
“I’ll see you soon.” He walked me out and nudged me towards the hallway.
“Yeah,” I muttered.
Lauren was on the other side, and stepped back so I could walk by, angling her body away from mine so I wouldn’t touch her.
My stomach tightened.
He’s not my man, he can do what he wants,I chanted repeatedly, but even from my lips, the words didn’t feel right.
He felt like mine in all the ways that he shouldn’t be, but it’s dangerous to get into anything with him. He had all the power to fuck my life up if it went bad.
I underestimated the amount of time I was inside, and I felt bad when I saw Jayda asleep in the driver’s seat.
Tap! Tap!
I knock lightly on the glass, wanting her to wake up, but now wanting to scare her.
She flinched peeking at me through one eye. She shut it again, then started fumbling with the buttons on the door, looking for the one that unlocked it. I don’t know the method to her madness, or why she won’t just open her damn eyes, so she can see.
Luckily, she eventually found the one she was looking for.
“Bitch, you were gone for two hours,” she mumbled sleepily, wiping the drool from her face.
“I’m sorry, girl. I didn’t think I'll be gone that long, but I got some tea and it’s hot, bitch!” I squealed out, bouncing in my seat. She put the keys in the ignition, but waited for me to speak instead of turning in on. “Nu uh. Drive and listen, hoe. I’m starving.”
She sucked her teeth, but turned the key over, and pulled outta the parking lot. I told her everything, starting from the moment I went inside, to the time I came out. I mentioned briefly about the exchange I saw between Love and Lauren, then I told her about what happened between us right before I walked out.
It was only the first day, and he’s already driving me crazy. I prayed for strength, and to get through the rest of my sentence unscathed, but I knew that wasn't possible. Not when he looked at me like I was the stars and the moon. Not when he made me feel more alive than I had in three years. Not when a part of me felt empty in his absence, and even though it’s only been five minutes since I left, I missed him already.
8
LOVE
Baby consumedmy thoughts way more than she should have. I can’t stop thinking about her, and ain’t no mistaking the connection that flowed between us. She had a calmness about her, an energy that drew me to her like a flame. I missed her like crazy, and it was taking every ounce of strength not to call her right now.
I’m pulled from my thoughts when my phone rung. Seeing Valentine’s name had me mad all over again about my damn cereal. He only hit me up for money, or a favor, and I don’t even wanna know which one he’s calling for.
“Sup, V.” I moved all my papers to one side of the desk and propped my foot up.
“The hospital called me. Mama was found walking around with blood on her shirt,” he told me, his nonchalant tone had me heated. “I need you to go and get her.”
My jaw clenched together, nose flaring in anger. We may be twins, but our mentalities couldn’t be more different. He can’t even take thirty minutes to pick his mama up.
“I’m working, muthafucka. Yo’ ass ain’t doing shit, why you can’t go get her?” I inquired, even though I could guess a million things this nigga finds more important.
“I got a hoe sliding through to give me some. You know how that is,” he boasted proudly, laughing like it’s funny.
“Nah, not really. Pussy come a dime a dozen, my nigga,” I reminded him. “But you only got one mama walking this earth. When you gone realize that?”
He grunted. “Just this one time, Love. Come on, man.”
I sighed, running my hand over my waves. “Aight, I’mma get her this time, but you need to get yo’ priorities in order and quick.”
I hung up on him mid-sentence.
Lauren was at the front counter again and I’m dreading this conversation already.
