There wasn’t anything he could do to hide the hard-on. Sometimes when an erection became inconvenient, he could think it back down, like slowing his heartbeat. Life was full of downer thoughts, images that could dampen desire.
Nothing like that could work now, though. There wasn’t any thought in the world that could make his dick go down with Nicole Pearce a foot away from him, contemplating letting him have her. His dick actually hurt and his balls were curled right up tightly against him, waiting to blow.
She searched his eyes, looking for something. He imagined she was looking for signs of violence. There was violence in him, sure, always had been, but never toward women or children. He’d never hurt a woman or a child and was grateful that his military career had never forced him to, because he wouldn’t have been able to.
But beyond that, he could never hurt Nicole Pearce. He’d rather shoot himself in the chest. He just hoped with all his heart that he could keep in control in bed with her, which was another matter.
Control.
He’d spent a lifetime in control of himself and had to grip himself tightly to keep it, because it felt like it was slipping away, like sand through a fist.
Finally her lips turned upward in a faint smile. “Okay,” she said softly.
All right!It was like letting a greyhound out of the gate.
A second later, they were shooting down the road, Sam trying to make it to his apartment as fast as legally possible. He wished he had one of those James Bond cars that could fly.
After twenty minutes at top speed, they were driving along the waterfront, the sun starting to set in a bloom of red on the water. It was a beautiful evening.
With any other woman, he’d remark on that. He’d driven countless women to his house or their house, knowing they were going to have sex, and he’d always been capable of keeping up a light conversation.
He couldn’t get any words out now, though. None. It was like his throat was seized up.
She didn’t seem to have any problems with that. He liked that she was comfortable with silence. She looked out at the vastness of the Pacific, the lower edge of the boiling crimson sun lighting gently on the horizon.
“It’s a lovely evening.”
Sam made a strangled noise in his throat and she turned to look at him.
“Where do you live? Where are we going?”
An ordinary question, deserving of an answer. He was going to scare her again if he couldn’t even freakingtalk.
He wrestled with himself, grabbed at a little self-control.
“Coronado Shores. Bought an apartment there over a year ago.” He had to actually think about driving. Red lights, green lights, brakes. He was a good driver, had a natural feel for it, but right now he had to work hard not to press the accelerator to the floor and the hell with everything. Probably drive them straight into a goddamned light pole. “I was essentially a Navy diver and when I moved back here, I knew I wanted to live close to the sea.”
That was part of it, but he didn’t say the whole truth—how he’d spent countless afternoons on the dunes a couple of miles down, spending as much time as possible away from Old Man Hughes’s fists, watching Navy SEALs go through their brutal paces. He’d longed to be one of them, part of a team of men with all the skills to make the world safer. Over the years, watching the hard men become harder by the day, he knew what he wanted to do with his life.
And now, in his post-military life, living in Coronado Shores meant he could run along the beach down to the training area and watch the new recruits rolling in the freezing surf and know that there would always be a new generation of men to watch over his country.
Nicole was looking around her with interest as they drove into Coronado Shores, passing by the first of the big condominium complexes. His was the last, La Torre. “I’ve been meaning to explore this part of town but I never got around to it,” she said softly.
“That so?” He was surprised. The area was a popular outing for San Diegans.
She looked at him with a faint smile. “We’ve only been here a year. Since we arrived, I’ve been really busy with Dad and Wordsmith. I’ve barely explored San Diego, just poked around a little, mainly in our part of town and the downtown area near our building.”
“I’ll show the area to you,” Sam offered. “Be happy to. I know the city like the back of my hand.”Afterwards.When we come up for air, whenever that will be.
She looked at him, a sideways dark blue glance that held a slight note of sadness. It hit him like a sledgehammer that she wasn’t really expecting to see him again after tonight.
Oh no, he wasn’t buying that. No way.
That big song and dance about her not having room for a man in her life? Fuck that. Sam would fucking plant himself at her fucking feet if that was what it took to keep seeing her.
“We’re here,” he said, veering sharply into his condo’s driveway, then plunging down into the underground garage. He drove into his slot and killed the engine.
His condo had 140 units and the garage was usually busy 24/7 with people coming and going. Oddly enough, though, right now it was deserted. The only sound was the ticking sound of his engine cooling.
