Taking a deep breath in through my nose, I prepare myself for the inevitable fatherly lecture I’ve only ever received from him.I shouldn’t resent him for it.I know he means well.But sometimes, I want a damn brother, not a pseudo-father, when the only example I’ve ever had is one for the books.Besides, disappointing Daddy Dearest is one thing.Disappointing Jagger is another beast entirely.
Unable to stand the silence, I order, “Just say it, Jag.”
“You sure you want to bring her into this?”
Okay, not what I was expecting.
“Bring her into what?”I ask, even when I already know the answer.
“This mess with Gus and Morgan.And Titas,” he adds, almost grudgingly.
“Who says I want to bring her into anything?”I challenge, though he hit the nail on the head like a seasoned blacksmith.Hell yeah, I’ve been thinking about it.How to protect her from our enemies.Even if it’s from a social standpoint and not a physical one, my life is messy, and there’s a line out the door of people who want to see me fail.I know from the outside looking in, our world appears as if it’s run by rainbows and butterflies when it couldn’t be further from the truth.And even though I know I never want to go there with anyone, lowering my walls and letting them in, it doesn’t mean I haven’t thought about it with June.What it would be like.If I could actually pull it off.If I could let my guard down without burning all that’s good in my life to the ground.
A twitch hits Jagger’s jaw as he stares at me, and I swear it’s heavier than the moon.“You don’t get to be impulsive with her.”
“Who says I’m being impulsive?”
“So you’re committed?”
“I didn’t say that?—”
“Jesus, Ford,” Hawke slams the locker shut and leans against it.“June isn’t someone you hook up with, then let loose.”
“She’s one of Violet’s best friends,” Jagger says.
Yeah, like I need the reminder.
Tongue in cheek, I shove my hands in my basketball shorts’ pockets and mutter, “I’m aware.”
“And she’s pretty damn innocent,” Hawke adds.“Or at least, she was.”
My mouth lifts at the reminder of everything we did last night, and everything I fantasized about doing with her since.It’s only half real.The smirk.The rest of me is still stuck on Jagger’s reminder of the deep shit we’re drowning in and how it could affect my little June Bug if I opened that door.“What’s your point?”I ask.
Jagger shakes his head, and I have a feeling I’m grinding on his last nerve.
“My point is, if you cross that line?—”
“Based on the footage last night, I’m pretty sure he’s already crossed it,” Roman interjects.
Jagger’s nostrils flare.“All right, if she thinks whatever is happening between you two means more than a good time,” he clarifies, “you two better be on the same page.”
His words drum up the look on her face as I climbed off her last night.Not sad or angry or even confused.Only…acknowledgment, like my departure wasn’t only accepted, but expected.It shouldn’t be possible.June Withers knowing how I’d react when I didn’t even know myself.Hell, maybe I wouldn’t have left at all if Roman hadn’t called to warn me about the cameras.Or maybe I’m giving myself too much credit.Maybe I should be more on June’s page, since it’s clear she knows me so well.
I look down at the ground, flexing my feet in my Nikes in hopes of grounding myself.Even then, it doesn’t take away the sting of realization.
I left her last night.Used her, then left her.
“Because if you two aren’t on the same page…” Removing the boxing gloves from training, Jagger stretches his hands in front of him, then makes another fist.“I’ll beat the shit out of you.”The calmness in his tone is eerie as fuck, and I fight the shiver racing down my spine.
“We all will,” Roman adds from the edge of the mat, his tatted arms crossed over his chest.And just like that, a glimpse of the Drifter inside of him, the one he hides so well, rises to the surface.So much so, I’m almost surprised a nine millimeter doesn’t appear in his big hands.
Well, would you look at that, June Bug?You have more people on your side than I do.
At least I’m not the only one who’s fallen prey to her pretty blue eyes.
Not that I’d admit it out loud.
My attention flicks from one person to the next.“I’m sorry, are you her brothers or mine?”
