I remembered his mother, Cezar looks like her. The gentle woman with festive nails and sincere eyes who used to show up at my parents’ gatherings. I was young, but she’d always been kind to me. Once, she told me she’d wished for a daughter—but she loved her boys fiercely, and they were going to be good. They were going to do good.
Back then, I didn’t understand what she meant. Now I did. I couldn’t speak much for Darius, but Codrin cared for Cezar. And Cezar loved with everything he had—for the people who deserved it.
How would it feel to be loved like that?
“I like it when you say my name.” His voice scraped out between breaths as his fingers laced through my hair. The warmth of him pressed along my body as we lay back down, tucking himself closer. “You are everything I thought I’d never have. Everything I thought I didn’t deserve.” Cezar tensed as the truth slipped out before he meant to share it.
A shiver crawled down my spine. He pulled back a little, regret clouding his eyes, fidgeting like he didn’t know what to do with the confession now that it existed in the air between us. It hung there, fragile and dangerous.
I wasn’t good at comforting people. I never have been. But I wanted to try—for him. I wanted him to know that every wound he carried hadn’t been for nothing. That whatever darkness waited for him, he didn’t have to face it alone anymore.
When I finally spoke, it was quiet. “Cezar…” His name tasted different this time. “Maybe we can face all this together. You and me?”
Maybe the cruelty in us—the trauma and desire—could make something that resembled salvation. I rested a hand against his chest and pulled him in, craving the familiar sin we shared.
Maybe we can free each other.
I wanted to say more, but what would I say?
I love you…
One last tear fell from his beautiful, scarred eye as he trapped me, knowing that we had just given each other hope.
What a dangerous thing.
Chapter 55
CEZAR
“Mmm… Petal, my Petal. I can tell you want to ask me more.” I murmured against her mouth as we pulled apart just long enough to breathe.
“… yeah.” Her voice was barely there. “I just wonder, have you ever tried to run?”
If she weren’t glued to me, I wouldn’t have heard her.
“Yes.” I tensed, every muscle locking. “Once.”
“What happened?” She followed me onto my back, then made herself comfortable at my side, using me like a pillow, her leg looping over mine.
“He made good on his promise.”
“What did he do, Cezar?”
“My brothers were on their way to meet some shady people. And I know—coming from us, that’s saying something. But these guys? Worse. A deal had been made, and all they had to do was pick up the product.”
I took a few breaths.
“They got there, and it was an ambush.”
Her fingers stilled on my ribs.
“The men who went with them? Dead. And my brothers; I heard they were in the hospital. So I came back. I had to. I needed to make sure they were going to be ok.”
My jaw flexed.
“Codrin had a stab wound. A few inches over and he’d be gone. Darius took a blow to the head so hard that he was out for hours, and his leg was broken. And I know his leg still bothers him.”
A long sigh left me. The image of my lifeless brothers in hospital beds brought me right back to my mom.
