Father knew what I was capable of. He’d always known. That was why he kept the leash short. Why he kept trying to convince everyone I was weak. He feared the day I’d fight back. I was nothing like him, which he hated. I loved with everything I had. He loved nothing and no one.
I lost track of how many men stepped in after that. They usually avoided my face so things wouldn’t look suspicious later. One got too bold, hit me across the cheek, and Father laid into him. Didn’t stop the rest from continuing. Each strike sent pain ricocheting across my body until I tasted iron.
“That’s enough. Take him to the cell. You know what to do,” he commanded.
They dragged me down the hall like dead weight and threw me into the familiar darkness. The door slammed, and it was like being erased. That was how Father did it. He’d try to break me, lock me away, barely keep me alive, and then drag me out when he thought I’dlearned.
Over the next few days, I wasn’t given any food and had barely enough water to survive on. The doctor would be in and out, attending to the wounds.
My phone had died. Father never took it away—he didn’t need to. He knew I wouldn’t do anything. He knew no one would come to save me.
Before the battery died, I’d managed to text Lina. I told her I would be MIA for a bit as I had some things to attend to. She knew I was lying because all she sent back was:Let me know when it’s over; I will clean you up.
That text kept me sane. Barely.
I didn’t even hear the guards at first. Lost in my head. Then hands grabbed me, pulling me up the stairs and into the same room—spotless now. Cleaners had made sure every trace of my suffering was wiped away.
“Cezar,” Father began, pacing with boredom, “I don’t think what I do is enough anymore. Something’s going on with you. Remember your place, and remember who could replace you at any time.”
He meant my brothers.
They shoved me onto my knees. I braced myself just before his hand met my face. He rarely left marks where others could see them, but this time, he didn’t seem to care. His anger boiled hotter when he caught the faint smile tugging at my lips. I’d been thinking of Lina.
He raised his hand again, and one of his men appeared with the whip he favored. My stomach sank.
Ah, fuck.
Hands snatched me, chained me to the wall. My arms were positioned high above my head, forcing every muscle in my back apart just as the first lash cut through the air with a loud, vicious crack. I gritted my teeth, jaw locked, knuckles burning asI tightened my fists. I pressed my forehead to the wall, its cold surface the only relief I had as the next strike landed.
Usually, the punishment was limited and focused, but this time it seemed endless. Each strike added to the red seeping through my clothes. He was screaming at me, but I didn’t make a sound.
Another crack echoed. For a split second, I wondered if maybe it was time to go see Mom.
No.
Fuck no.
And leave my Petal alone? Never.
Lina was waiting. She had to be. I thought of her beauty, her softness, her cruelty, her everything. I grasped at her desperately. Eyes closed, I let myself fall into the sanctuary of her care that awaited me beyond this torment. The only place where this nightmare didn’t exist.
It would be all right.
The lashes stopped, and his henchmen unshackled me, sending me crumbling to the ground. My body gave out completely. I couldn’t feel half of myself anymore. I was towed to another room where the doctor stitched me like a patchwork doll again. He was nothing compared to Dorin.
Eventually, I woke up in my own room. Agony hit the second I moved. Thank god I still had some leftover pain meds in my bag. I swallowed them dry and immediately dug into the stash of food I always kept hidden. I ate everything—chips, jerky, whatever I had.
Then I spotted the old liquor bottle I’d stolen from Father months ago.
Terrible fucking idea.
Didn’t care. I needed to forget, even if the forgetting only lasted minutes.
The liquor burned down my throat, numbing just enough of the agony to make breathing easier. Mixing it with pain meds was stupid as fuck, but the relief hit fast. Time warped. My body went floaty and distant, and walking felt like balancing on a sinking ship.
A knock interrupted the haze. Codrin. The only one it could be. I remained silent, hoping he’d take the hint and leave like everyone else did. “I’m coming in. Hopefully, you’re decent.”
Codrin stepped inside and found me in my usual disguise—long sleeves, sweatpants, the uniform I used to keep hidden from my brothers. I swayed a little as I faced him.
