Then she pressed the tip against me, teasing the entrance before easing inside. I tried to breathe through it.
There was discomfort at first, the kind that gave way to pleasure the longer she worked me open.Pleasure in the pain. Adelina knew exactly what she was doing, and I trusted her completely. Her hands locked around my hips, guiding me through each movement, making sure I felt every inch of what she was giving me.
She must have noticed when my body adjusted to the sensation because then she started to fuck me, hard, shoving deep inside of me. Then nearly out and back in again—relentless in her rhythm. Each thrust interrupted every attempt to breathe.
Pure fucking ecstasy.
I could feel everything at once—blood warm against my back and lube down my thighs, tears spilling free without permission. I didn’t care, though. I was loving every minute of this.
For the first time in years, I was truly free.
Chapter 76
ADELINA
Iwouldn’t have killed him, even when the truth finally settled into my bones. Part of me wanted to drag what he was feeling out a little longer, but it was wrong.
It’s not fair.
“Say it, say the safe word.” The words tore out of me between uneven breaths, between the sobs I tried to swallow and every pulse of pain that hit both of us. He wouldn’t do it. Cezar wanted more, wanted me to keep going.
“Fucking say the safe word!” I screamed as I drove my frustration, my grief, everything into each forceful movement. I was terrified. He wasn’t. He met every thrust like he deserved it.
“I’m so sorry, Adelina…” His breaths were thin, labored. Sadness poured out of me faster than I could blink it back. I didn’t know which of us I mourned more—him, or the version of myself I lost years ago. Tears fell freely, disappearing into the blood and slick mess between us.
“It’s ok,” he choked out. “I hate me too.”
I stopped, slowly pulling out, hearing his little whimper at the loss of movement. Mind and body pushed past their limit, and I’d kept going like I was trying to punish both of us.
Why did I push?
I moved to the front of him, lifting his head with both hands. Steady tears streamed down his cheeks. “You’re beautiful. I am so proud of you, Adelina.”
No.
No, no, no.
I couldn’t stop crying. He was the only one I ever wanted to be vulnerable with, and here he was—paying the price for loving me.
I ripped the strap-on from my hips and fumbled with the lock holding him in place. The moment I unlatched the pillory, his legs gave in. I caught him as best I could, and we collapsed together on the floor. His breath came in ragged gasps, impossible to control. I had never seen him cry like this. Never seen him truly break.
This isn’t what I want.
“Cezar… please…” My voice shook so badly it barely sounded like mine. “I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. I didn’t mean—”
He shifted, trying to sit. I helped him lean against the wall even though the pressure must’ve hurt like hell against the fresh marks on his back.
“Stop, Adelina.” His voice struggled. “You gave me an out. I didn’t take it. I didn’t want it. I deserve thi—”
“No, you fucking don’t. Neither of us deserved what happened to us.” My throat ached with every word. “I know it wasn’t your fault. I believe you. I don’t blame you, and I could never hate you.”
Cezar lit up with his perfect fucking smile. Before I could say another word, he rushed in, voice unsteady. “I love you. I’ve been in love with you since the day we met. You’re everything to me. Will you stay by my side… even though loving me will hurt?”
He reached for me, and I climbed onto his lap, careful not to brush too many of the wounds I’d left on him.
“Cezar, your love has trapped me, and I wouldn’t change a damn thing. I love you too. For longer than I should have.” I kissed him slowly—soft pecks along his cheek and jaw, tasting salt and heat. I felt the tension ease out of him under my mouth.
His warm hands settled on my thighs.
