But I’m done shutting down. I’m done running from what I want. Working on the menu, seeing how people are receiving this thing that I built, and falling in love with cooking again ... it’s scary, and I’m absolutely petrified that I’m going to fall flat on my face again, but Ihaveto try. I don’t think I’ll forgive myself if I don’t.
“I’m not going to shut down.”
He doesn’t look up. He just continues picking at the blanket wrapped around him.
“I’m going to the bank tomorrow.”
He pauses, holding his breath. Waiting.
“I’m going to ask them about a loan,” I continue.
His eyes snap to mine, and I see the hope filling them.
“And I’m going to try to buy Sunnie’s for myself.”
He doesn’t move, not right away, and I think he’s waiting for me to saypsych. But I don’t. I mean it. I’ve been thinking about it a lot, and I can’t help but feel like I have to at least try.
When I say nothing, Ezra launches himself at me.
I giggle as he peppers kisses over my face. My nose, my chin, my cheeks, my forehead. Every inch is covered as he slides on top of me, all his good parts lining up with mine.
“Fuck, Sunny. You don’t know how happy that makes me.”
“Really? Because I’m pretty sure I can feel it,” I say, driving my hips up into his very obvious erection.
“To be fair, I’malwaysthat kind of happy when it comes to you.” He kisses the corner of my mouth, then pulls away, his eyes turning serious. “Are you sure, though? I don’t want to pressure you into anything you don’t want to do.”
“You’re not. I’ve been thinking about it for weeks now. I can’t stop, actually. Having my own place has been my dream since I was a kid, and I can’t keep denying myself that dream just because I’m scared. I have to try, or I know I’ll regret it if I don’t. But don’t get your hopes up too high. I haven’t even been approved for anything, and I don’t know if I will be. I have decent savings, but waterfront property is expensive. Who knows if I can even afford it?”
I tell myself it wouldn’t be a big deal, but that’s a lie. This location is perfect for everything I’m already dreaming up.
Ezra swallows. “I’ll help you.”
“What?” I laugh. “Don’t be ridiculous.”
“I’m not. I’m being serious. I’ll help you.”
“Ezra . . .” I shake my head. “You can’t. You . . .”
“Believe in you, Sunny. I believe in you, and I know you can do this. In fact, I have so much fucking faith in you that I want to be your first investor.”
Another disbelieving laugh tumbles free. “Come on, Ezra. You can’t be serious.”
“I am.”
“Isn’t oursituationcomplicated enough?”
It’s the first time we’ve brought it up in a long time, probably too long, but it doesn’t mean it’s not something I haven’t thought about. Especially not with how my heart is starting to war with my head.
“I—” Ezra starts, and he snaps his mouth closed because he doesn’t have a good answer for that, and he knows it. He exhales slowly. “Can’t you just let me help you?”
“No.”
His green eyes narrow. “Stubborn brat.”
“You like it.”
“I do,” he says, nuzzling his nose against mine. “I really fucking do.”
