She then surprised me by boldly cupping my junk, whichdidn’t even feel a tingle of excitement. “I think you’ve got plenty for me to work with.”
What. The. Fuck.
I grabbed her hand and shoved it away. “Touch me again like that, and I’ll have you charged with sexual assault.”
“Jaxon.” She straightened her spine with alarm.
“I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, I’m not interested, Molly. Now, can you please leave me alone?”
I had one rule: don’t hook up with anyone local. Ever.
I didn’t do drama, and I didn’t do messy; both of those attributes were synonymous with unnecessary chaos and a lack of control around swirling small-town gossip, and I preferred to stay far from both since I had enough of that on the job.
“You know, you can be a real asshole sometimes.”
“Think what you will, but I’ve been honest with you from the beginning. It’s not my fault if you perceive things differently in your head.”
“Wow, Jaxon, wow. You’re really in a mood tonight.”
She wasn’t wrong.
I stared into my drink, absently swirling the contents around in the glass while the vibe behind me in the dimly lit bar was thick with an energy I couldn’t seem to touch, and no amount of champagne, vodka, rum, or whatever the hell people were drinking could numb the pain of my past.
The truth was, no drink, distraction, or fruitless countdown was ever going to erase the one thing that haunted me—the love of my life, who vanished without a trace over ten years ago. My heart clenched with the weight of that loss, making every celebration that followed feel hollow.
It didn’t matter how many faces I saw, how many “Happy New Years” I heard, or how many celebratory wishes for thepromise of love, health, and happiness in the new year were exchanged. The empty space in my chest was a hollow weight I couldn’t shake off, while the past kept slapping me in the face. Everyone around me was celebrating something new, something promising, while I was stuck replaying the same damn heartbreak year after year.
Maybe I used alcohol to dull the edges on occasion, although it never really took the sting away if I were being honest.
Time didn’t heal; it just made the emptiness more familiar.
Fuck, I needed out of this funk.
I didn’t often wallow in my feelings, but this night always cast a dark, looming shadow over me.
Throwing back the last of my drink, I was damn grateful when I turned around and saw that Boden, my best friend, along with his fiancée, Lakelyn, my twin brother, Jameson, and his wife, Arizona, had finally arrived at McQuade’s.
“Maxim at Mom and Dad’s?” I heard Jameson ask our younger brother, Ford, as I approached them from behind.
“Yeah, Mom insisted, and Maxim was super excited once he heard all that she had planned.”
I chuckled, knowing our Mom probably let Maxim pick his favorite junk food from the grocery store. “Fifty bucks says the only one who actually makes it until midnight is Maxim,” I said, draping my arms over their shoulders, pulling them into a hug, and anchoring them to me as a reminder of what was important—my family.
“I’ll take that bet. Shake on it?” Ford held his hand out toward me.
“Man, I love taking your money.” I smirked, shaking his hand before making my way over to the rest of our group.
“Hey, guys.” I clapped Boden on the shoulder before leaningin to kiss Lakelyn on the cheek. “I was beginning to think you weren’t going to show up.”
“Nah, just lost track of time.” Yeah, I wasn’t buying his sorry excuse for a second. “Plus, it’s tradition to spend New Year’s together.”
“You know there will be a day y’all switch out the bar for home with your families, right?”
“Doesn’t mean you aren’t any less welcome.”
I knew he meant well; he always did. Boden was a good man, maybe the best I knew. Although that didn’t mean I wanted his pity.
“Yeah, because that’s what everyone wants, a mopey-ass sulking in the corner.”
